lizzie
by allboysshouldhavelonghair
Summary: The rather unproud and completely prejudiced story about how I fell in love with my arch enemy.
1. Chapter 1

"The Nedlands Mansion is let at last!"

A flurry of squeals followed and no sooner had the declaration been made, than the newspaper was thrown up against the light, and three sets of eyes peered eagerly at its contents. Those eyes belonged to, predictably, my two youngest sisters, still in high school, and, less predictably… my mother.

"He'll have to marry one of the girls," she murmured, nudging my father. The movement almost spilled the contents of his mug, and Dad turned emphatically in consternation, but all this went completely unnoticed by the older lady.

"Oooh, his name is Harrison Bandly," informed Jenny to anyone who would listen, with all the due expectation of limelight appropriate for a lastborn. "Of Bandly Investments!"

"Do you think he's _really_ rich?" asked Shannon, her grin hopeful.

"Lord, you're so dense sometimes Shannon, of course he's _really_ rich," chided Jenny, and Shannon's hazel eyes blinked in failure. "He's probably filthy rich - he's staying in _Nedlands_, that's practically Peppermint Grove."

"I bet he's handsome," mused my mother, wistfully. Her fuzzy dark hair, inherited by both Jenny and I, was piled up on top of her hair in a messy bun. I sometimes wondered if in twenty years, I would look exactly like her: pretty dark eyes shining, wrapped in smile lines.

"…interest in a man purely because of his money is wholly superficial," spoke Mary, the very middle daughter with a penchant for 1950's fashion. She touched the back of her head, ensuring no strands were misbehaving; the streaming sunlight caught her short chestnut curls and tinted them auburn. "We should seek to pursue a character of homeliness and purity..."

"A character of boredom."

"I am not dense!"

"Of course you aren't, darling."

"See?"

"_See?_" mocked Jenny, pulling the delicate sheet of newspaper to herself and out of reach of Shannon's flailing arms.

"Girls. Quiet. Now."

The order was barked from behind Dad's segment of newspaper; his bushy grey eyebrows peeking over the paper furrowed.

Numerous pouts ensued.

He was not deterred, as a father of five daughters ought not to be.

"…or for the next one who speaks about this Bandly man, I will find out where this fellow lives, ring his doorbell and leave him a photo of you as a baby, crawling naked in the paddling pool."

"Oh, Michael," cried Mum, "don't tease them like that. They don't know you're joking!"

"Who says I am?" he replied, slowly lowered the paper's edge and looking over his reading glasses to stare down my mother, his soft blue eyes sparkling. "And who says you're not included in that threat?"

Mum clasped her mouth firmly closed after that, though not for very long. Moments passed in relative silence – each sister eating her breakfast, each parent ignoring their child's thoughts – before Mum turned to Anna, the oldest sister of us all.

"Are you sure you won't be able to come away with us next week? Mrs. Taylor told me that the young man who worked in the ice cream factory last year _will_ be there again…"

"I'm really sorry, Mum," she replied, tucking a delicate curl of blonde hair behind her ear, "but the summer classes run straight through January. I just can't miss them."

"Yes, well, I don't know why you can't just take a job at your uncle's office, he's always saying that they need a new receptionist. And, you'd be earning a wage, instead of paying all those fees they charge. Honestly, I don't know where all that money goes…"

The thought of thousands of dollars drew my mother into a temporary verbal reprieve, until her eyes suddenly rested on me, and hardened.

"And I won't even start with you, Elizabeth…"

"That's probably a good plan," I laughed, but it was to no avail.

"…head off in a science book, no time for boys, working all summer… _Miss Independent_."

"Mum, in some countries, women aren't even allowed to go to-"

"But at least I'll find some comfort in my younger girls, they haven't abandoned me yet…"

"Mum!" I cried, finally halting her wistful lament, "You've got me stuck here for another year, at least. Anna too. We're not going anywhere."

"Good," muttered Dad.

"Good," seconded Shannon.

"Can I get your room when you move out?" Jenny pressed, completely serious. I bit back a grin and shook my head.

"We're going to be late!" shrieked Mary, her fancy gold watch face turned upwards. Just then, the grandfather clock in the hall agreed.

"Everyone in the car," called Mum as the dirty dishes were furiously passed across the table and its contents cleared up in a practiced heartbeat. The dining room was vacated in a rush as we panicked all the way to the front door.

As one-by-one we exited, I pulled up short and strolled back to the dining room, grinning.

"Anytime you are ready..."

My father, closing his paper slowly and removing his glasses, simply looked over to me, smirked and nodded. 

* * *

The church was buzzing as we spilled out of the beat-up people-mover and piled into the foyer. The building was airy and light, and ushers stood in front of black drapes handing out sermon outlines.

"Peace be with you," stated an older lady, her perfectly coiffed hairdo only outdone by the preciseness of her pantsuit.

"Yeah, cool," I answered, consecutively grabbing the proffered sheet of paper and Anna's wrist and heading for the very far side of the church auditorium.

Dad liked it better when we all sat together as a family, but lately I'd felt like we were one giant magnet - Anna, Dad and I on one end, Mum and the girls on the other. We were completely opposite, always repelling the other side but never able to actually separate.

"I'd never let Mum catch me saying that though," I explained over the music to Anna as we were finding our seats in the back row.

"Oh no, she might be offended, of course."

"Maybe, but I doubt she would even understand it… after all, '_magnets go on the fridge Lizzie'…_"

(I didn't even need to paraphrase. In 12th grade I'd tried to have a discussion with her about electromagnetic eddy currents.)

Forcing down a chuckle, my affection stirred at Anna's bewilderment and I clarified.

"…but she would be mortified that I'd used a science analogy in front of people. _'How are you going to get a husband if you always talk nonsense?'_"

"She didn't say that."

"She did."

Before Anna could come to the defence of my poor mother, the music lulled and then ceased, effectively ending our conversation. The pastor invited the congregation to sit and a breeze graced my legs as someone rushed to the chair beside me.

"Stacey!" I whispered much too loudly, my best friend in the world forcing an awkward chair-hug upon me. The jet-black hair fell across my cheek and the adorably chubby arms held my neck. I knew all was right in the world.

"Lizzie!"

"I've _missed_ you!" I sang. "Too much."

"Lizzie. It's been twelve hours."

"Man, we're strong."

Chastised by the 'ahem' of a polite congregation member, we shushed and our attention darted to the preacher. Several minutes in, however, my mind fell off the pastor and his riveting power point, complete with alliterated bullet points, and perused the crowd.

Suddenly, a head of hair caught my attention – blonde, uncontrollable locks on wide shoulders and a light blue dress shirt.

Definitely male.

Definitely new.

Poor guy.

**_Who is he_?** I scribbled on my sermon notes, because a new beau in the rows of a church is more fascinating than a new alliteration, and I was sure the balding, middle-aged pastor would understand that.

I was sure.

It was a truth universally acknowledged or something.

Stacey raised an eyebrow.

Conjuring all the subtly I owned, I nodded towards Mr. CurlyBlondeHairMysteryMan and tapped my note several times.

The sides of my best friend's mouth lifted and she slid my paper towards herself, writing briefly.

**You noticed quickly ;)**

She's a tease, this one.

Certain she was watching, I rolled my eyes and slid back my paper.

_**Doth we know anything about him…eth?**_

**We most certainly do…eth.**

_**Spill. Now.**_

Stacey's sly smirk turned into a genuine smile as she proceeded to scribble for the next few minutes. Handing it back, I acknowledged her Social Media sampling and read:

**Name: Harry**

**Relationship Status: Single**

**Home Town: Melbourne, Victoria**

**Current Location: Perth, Western Australia**

**Religious Views: Well, he's in church isn't he?**

**Political Views: Who cares, he's gorgeous!**

**About him: Moved to WA last week, reason he gave was to expand his whatever-he-does investment business (my words) and is looking for a church to "feel at home in" (his words). **

**_Poor guy has no idea that he's going to be eaten alive here._**

**The ratio?**

**_It's a killer._**

* * *

"I'm Harry, so pleased to make your acquaintance."

The service had finished and his large hand reached out. I chortled. Gathering my senses, I thrust my hand into his.

"Lizzie. Lizzie Bennet."

I moved my gaze from our conjoined hands, my vision rose up and up, until it finally came to rest upon a cute, boyish face with a lopsided grin. And his eyes! Matching pale blue irises that practically begged you to like him, or risk shattering his heart into a million ragged pieces.

I didn't want to risk that.

Harry was a level of cute I'd not yet come across before in a human.

Puppy dog cuteness.

Puppy-dog-cuddled-beside-a-duckling-on-top-of-a-cooing-baby cuteness.

Yeah, that cute.

Our favourite stranger smiled at me politely; it was clear that he did not recognize my name from some obscure regency novel.

Thankfully, Stacey hijacked the introduction train.

"And this is Lizzie's sister, Anna."

The change in his demeanour was dramatic; his face flushed and his smile widened and he didn't seem to know what to do with the rest of his body. Looking over, I was mortified to see that Anna was in exactly the same way.

"Anna," I hissed. "Shake the poor boy's hand."

Her gentle eyes avoided his gaze, but she held out her hand. Harry wasted no time in grasping her own in his and shaking it enthusiastically.

(As if he did anything with less than complete excitement.)

"Harry, uh, Harrison. Harrison Bandly."

I almost choked on my breath. With wide eyes, I sought out my sister for confirmation but at this period of time, she wasn't meeting anyone's gaze.

She barely even whispered her name.

"Anna Bennet."

Despite her obvious shyness towards him, which anyone who knew her half-well would read as attraction, I was sure she hadn't realized who he was.

"It's exceptionally wonderful to meet you. Uh, to meet you all, I mean. You all seem like such lovely women."

Brushing fake dust off my shoulder with practiced ease, I drawled, "Thanks."

"I can't say for certain that all the women here are all as endearing as Anna and Lizzie…" bragged Stacey, tossing a free arm around Anna's stiff shoulder. Anna replied with a stricken glance.

".. but I can say for certain that you _will_ meet them all," I finished with a smirk. Especially when they find out who he is.

Bless his soul, Harry showed none of the telltale signs of terror common in many young men faced with the onslaught of desperate, single females.

"There are some wonderful women that-" began Anna in a rush of courage, albeit in a timid voice and scarcely bold enough to draw anyone's attention. Unfortunately, the shy, quiet sister was overpowered by the younger, much louder, much less subtle sisters. They could be heard screeching through the auditorium, on their way towards us.

"Jenny! _I _wanted to show Anna."

Tension tightened within my stomach as they approached.

"Anna!" Jenny raced up to her oldest sister, narrowly avoiding a collision with Stacey's torso. "Look, look. Simone Gilfred gave this to me today and it's just so- … who are you?" her tone sliding from impatience to adoration as she caught a look at our dishy new friend's face.

"I'm Harrison Ban-"

"He's Harry," I interjected quickly, throwing nonchalance into my air. "From over east."

Anna might not have realized who he was, but my ridiculously-flighty-yet-strangely-astute youngest sister would have figured it out in the blink of an eye.

And why impose that so soon on one _so-gosh-darn cute_?

Shannon rushed up and only just avoided a collision with Stacey on her other side.

'What is with your sisters today?' her eyes bemoaned privately.

'Hey, I have to _live_ with it,' my eyes replied.

"Jenny, you were supposed to wait for me!" cried Shannon, her petulance peeking through her desire to please the latest male addition to our circle of acquaintance.

But Jenny was distracted and had no time for competition, however ridiculous it seemed.

"Oh, _hi_ Harry," she cooed. "Hey, look at what Simone gave me, isn't it pretty?" Jenny theatrically extended the sparkly necklace towards Anna, while simultaneously locking eyes with Harry. "Just like me, huh?"

A shoulder twitch and a smirk chased her comment and before I could grab that shoulder and spin her away from us, her face fell. "I showed it to Mary but she just wanted to go home already. It's because she has no friends…"

"Jenny!" I scolded, silently wishing that for just once our family could make a good first impression.  
"Well, it's true…"

"Oh!" exclaimed Harry, having not even heard Jenny. His vision hadn't left Anna since she'd taken the silver necklace from Jenny and twirled it through her long fingers. "What _is_ the time?" Shaggy blonde hair fro-ed to and forth as he scanned his audience for answers. "I said I would meet my sister out the front when church finished."

I inwardly balked.

He's the owner of a booming investment company and his sister picks him up? Family issues, much?

_**You can talk, Lizzie.**_

Quiet, brain.

I twisted my wrist, my watch copying the action.

"Oh my! Oh dear. I'm late."

"Then you must hurry," spoke Anna, the first time she'd opened her mouth since trying to defend the wonderfulness of women in the church everywhere. Again, her face flushed and her mouth closed tightly shut in soundless surprise.

Conjuring up hundreds of ploys to make sure we saw Harry again, I had to eat my thoughts when Jenny, bless her annoying soul, saved the day.

"There's a picnic, next Saturday, by the South Perth Foreshore… I'll be there…you should come."

The lines framing Harry's pale eyes tensed as he rubbed the rolled-up sleeve of his shirt.

"She means to say that it's a Young Adults thing," I added, saving Harry and turning to Jenny, "and no, you won't be there, you're all going to Busselton, remember?"

"Oh… oh well, never mind Harry."

Like an encroaching storm cloud, the need to clarify the situation to our new handsome friend hovered in and sought vehemently to overwhelm. "No, please come Harry, because the _grown-ups_ will all be going, and you can meet more of the people that go to church here, eat some food, have a turn sailing…?"

"Oh," and he laughed in understanding, his hand falling from his sleeve. "Sure, wonderful, excellent. How exciting!"

Jenny only folded her arms with a _harrumph_.

"Right, so I'll see you all on Saturday then."

"Yep, midday onwards," added Stacey, ever-the-practical. "We'll provide the meat and salad and feel free to bring along any friends you have, or your sister, or whoever, that's cool."

"Oh, wow, great! Okay, I'll see you then. Bye girls!"

And he rushed off, out the entrance, a whirlwind of blonde mess, husky cologne and gorgeousness. Oh, and did I mention gosh darn cuteness?

Cos there was definitely that, too.

* * *

A/N: Whhhhaaaat? After so many years of reading your collective brilliance Great FanFiction Writers, I decided to upload my one and only story for your perusal.  
I have formatting issues in this medium not present in my Word Document (but don't we all), mainly because I adore Align Right (which is Lizzie's Brain) and toying with a few script fonts for the scribbling of the girls. But, c'est la vie.

I'm hoping this will make sense as a stand-alone novel, but if you're too confused and you reckon it's because I've just completely overlooked something, that's the stuff I want to know.

Nedlands, Peppermint Grove and Busselton are real places in Western Australia.

You're all great.

Michelle xo.


	2. Chapter 2

The city skyline faulted ever so slightly in its precise reflection on the SwanRiver. The tiniest of breezes whispered, taunted, teased the image, elongating buildings and breaking up the grey of construction with the brilliant azure of the skies. A few fine cirrus clouds streaked the heavens, adding to the delicate masterpiece, but it would never be enough to dampen our afternoon.

This city was, in a word, perfect.

"Well, I sure like it," replied Stacey, sitting side-saddle on the picnic rug after I'd told her of my thoughts. Shrieks and laughter floated in the air, pulled from the mouths of our friends playing cricket. Others sat in lazy circles chatting and sharing videos on their phones. Stacey finished snapping a photo of the skyline on her phone and mindlessly hummed a tune as her fingers scrolled the gallery.

At that moment, my stomach joined in the chorus.

"Shhh," I scolded, giving my innards a stern look before lowering my head to the grass, satiated. "Oh, I'm stuffed. Why did I eat so much food? …Stacey, why did you let me eat so much food?"

Stacey glanced over to me, her brown eyes sheepish, and shrugged. "You didn't want it to go to waste. Do you think I over-catered again?"

"Maybe… yes. But it's a very reassuring housewifely quality," I smirked, throwing my arm to the side and connecting with her thigh.

"If only, Lizzie," she retorted back with a grin. "But for every wife, there needs to be a husband and I can't see that happening anytime soon, not for the same single reason that we have too much food…"

"…Not enough blokes."

"Not enough blokes."

I sighed, readjusting my sunglasses. "Have we seen Harry yet?"

"No, we have not."

"I thought he'd come, he seemed so interested in Anna…"

A pelican soared overhead, casting a temporary shadow upon the verdant field, and I fell into silence, biting my thumb nail.

Eventually, Stacey spoke again. "You know what? The next time she sees him, she should just ask him out on a date."

Craning my neck, I raised my sunglasses and peered at her, blinking madly. "What?"

Stacey was unperturbed. "She should."

"Before she even knows him?"

"She can get to know him on the date."

"What if he says no?"

"Then he says no. But what if she waits, and he never asks?"

"He _will_ ask…" I replied, confidence piercing my voice, my head bobbing with affirmation. A sideways glance to my best friend and suddenly, I wasn't so sure. "He will ask, won't he?"

Stacey, watching the slow ebb of the tide at the shore, pressed her lips together in a firm line.

"Only a very brave man can be in love with no hint of reciprocation."

The muscles between my shoulder blades tensed at her assertion.

"She gives hints…" I defended.

"They are very subtle, Lizzie, she's always been like that."

"And that's good! If Mum's friends catch even a whiff of flirtation, we'll never hear the end of it."

Memories flooded back of the time Mum found out that Anna had visited Fred Korauckas, her tenth grade science partner, when he was sick. For the next month, Mum kept 'accidentally' calling her, "my little Anna Kournikova" whenever her friend, Mrs. Ellis was around.

"But what if her subtlety leaves Harry as equally in the dark?" countered Stacey, her hands folded together, lingering at her mouth.

"If he can't figure out what she's about, then he's not looking hard enough."

"Lizzie, you can tell, and I can tell, but you'd be hard-pressed to find any man that can read your sister as well as us."

"Give him time, though, I'm sure it'll all fall into place."

"Time, she may not have. There are plenty of other women who, given just a seed of hope, will put everything on the line at their earliest opportunity." Stacey leant back, folded her chubby arms and threw on a face that screamed experience. "And some men, those who are kind-hearted and eager to please, tend not to resist."

She had me. There were four years of life experience on her that I had yet to achieve and I just couldn't argue with that. Maybe she was right, but I hoped not.

"Anyway," Stacey said, softening at my unspoken concession, and turning her attention back to the scrolling of photos, "barring the possibility of a dark homicidal tendency in him, I'm sure whoever marries Harry would be happy, regardless of who asked whom on the first date."

"Hmmm, that's true."

Slowly, steadily, the warmth of the sunshine and the fullness of my belly sang lullabies. I flopped an arm over my eyes and drifted, mulling over the carefully choreographed dance of Christian flirting, the pivots, the grapevines and even the do-si-dos.

Then, I paused. I'd never been one for dancing.

Movement rustled and the blanket tugged as Stacey rose. Peeking from my covert position, I grinned as she wandered over to a large group of girls watching a few guys kick around a soccer ball.

'Outnumbered again,' I ruminated blithely, the smell of a far-off barbeque lingering on the breeze. 'And with too much food.'

* * *

Time passed indeterminably as the siren's call of the foreshore enchanted, the seagulls, the lapping of the river as a boat sailed past, far off children's shrieks of joy and God himself coming down to play cricket with the locals. I dozed, I napped, I daydreamed.

And suddenly, the warm sun was gone, replaced instead by cooling shadow.

Squinting against the sun, I met the silhouette of a tall, broad shouldered body. His back was to me, and all I could distinguish was dark brown hair, cut neatly and a pair of designer sandals on his long legs, before Harry's voice piped up.

"I'm so very sorry - we got lost, that is, uh, I got lost, so I rang the number of the pastor from last Sunday and he gave me the directions."

"Well, we're just so glad that you could make it at all, aren't we Anna?" Stacey said, and looking up, I spied the smirking eyes of my favourite matchmaker.

"Very glad," Anna's melodic voice danced on the breeze.

"Now you're met some of the girls already, including Lizzie-" at which point Stacey actually kicked me in the side and whispered '_getuplizzie_' rather forcefully and not at all like a housewife.

"Pretentious homemaker," I muttered, stumbling to my feet, reaching out to hug Harry.

"Hey mate, good to see you again."

"You too, Lizzie."

"Oh, a hug. How familiar…" a female voice uttered. Across Harry's shoulder, mid-hug, I shot a glance and spied another stranger. Her bleached-blonde hair fell short on her shoulders, silky in straightness and revealing just enough dark roots to be fashionable. Blue eyes looked on, disinterested, and perfectly accentuated by dark make-up and high cheekbones.

A rush of desperation willed this woman to be the sister that Stacey had mentioned because Anna's chance of happiness shouldn't need to end before it had even begun.

Harry stood back, laughing his goofy chuckle as he addressed the woman. "Chrissy, it's fine, really. Everyone is just very friendly here."

Chrissy folded her arms and jutted out her chin. "Well, I'm not hugging anyone…" she declared, a quality of self-importance layering her tone. Her expression altered, almost to a panic, and her cat-like eyes shot to the man from the silhouette. "Unless, of course, I know them very well."

"Well, we won't hug unless you want us to," Stacey assured, smiling and throwing out her hand. "I'm Stacey."

"Oh, this is my sister, Chrissy," Harry stumbled, awkwardly gesturing to the impassive female; her perfectly manicured nails held loose in a flimsy handshake with Stacey, only following as an after thought to her brief, insincere wave for the benefit of the rest of us.

"And this," continued Harry, resting his arm on the other man's shoulder, "is my best mate, Will."

Before our new friend could speak, a few words escaped from my mouth – a soft passing mumble of unfiltered thought, like air deflating from a bouncy castle.

"Oh thank goodness, another male."

No one heard, except one.

Stacey hardly slowed as she continued the circle of introductions, but the guarded dark eyes of Harry's friend sauntered slowly – warily – until they rested on my face. His stare had weight, and its burden lay on my shoulders.

"And this is Lizzie," Stacey gestured, interrupted immediately by movement whizzing towards us. My arm lurched forward and grabbed the flying object out of the sky. I stood awkwardly holding the iridescent blue Frisbee inches from Will's chest.

"I'm pretty sure I just saved your life," I mused, pulling the Frisbee in and tossing it over to its owner, a teenage girl with knee-high socks and a skateboard. She rocked her consequences-be-damned style.

I smiled, and spun back to Will, who was now, I had to admit, surprisingly handsome. "But don't worry about it, what's one life-debt between friends."

"Friends?" he questioned, desperately searching for the faces of those he knew best. Unfortunately for Will, Harry and Anna had been ushered away towards the catamarans by our resident marriage broker, and Chrissy had found a wooden bench on which to lounge across and look fabulous.

I uttered, "Yeah, well, it's not binding…"

"Forgive me," he interrupted, wearing his tension in his eyes, "what was your name? Laura, was it?"

"Lizzie."

"Oh," he corrected himself, looking away. "Lisa, right."

"No," I said, enunciating with clear vowels as if to a small child - which clearly coincided with this man's mental ability - "It's Elizabeth."

The dark eyes stared down at me, refusing to reveal his tell, and said nothing. In that moment, like seeing the trees through a forest, I realised that I'd been wrong; his eyes were a dark shade of blue, not brown.

The melody of Anna's laughter yanked me back to reality, with consequent whiplash included. Out on the water, Anna and Harry were drifting upstream, the steady breeze filling their sail.

Inwardly, I groaned. For Anna's sake, I would have to try to like Harry's friend, even if he was disturbingly beyond comprehension.

"Are you from Melbourne as well?"

"Yes."

"And will you be in Perth for long?"

"As long as Harry needs me."

"Oh, so you would be staying close by to him, then."

"I am staying _with_ him," he replied, like I was the stupidest person alive.

Anna's laughter rang out again and I briefly thought about handing in my Wingman Position resignation letter. No, no, I love Anna more. I pressed on.

"And, do you sail, Will?"

"At times, I do, yes. But if you are asking whether I'll participate today then the answer is no."

"Why not?"

Straightening awkwardly, Will saw the shoreline across the river and swallowed, fiddling with his expensive watch.

"I don't feel it's… _proper_… to sail alone with a girl that I don't know."

My eyebrows shot up and I folded my arms, cursing the blush that crept up my cheeks. "I'm not a serial killer."

"That's not what I-"

"Will, sweetie!" Chrissy arrived, petulance forming in the corners of her mouth, "Why are you still standing here? I wanted you to keep me company…"

"What about with Chrissy, then?" I burst out, the blush draining as I grasped for my dignity. "You two know each other, don't you?"

"Oh honey," she replied, her voice as velvety as an 80's prom queen, "We _more_ than know each other."

Will shifted slightly, returning even more attention to his beloved watch.

"So… you'll have a turn, Chrissy?"

"Oh, there's no way." She offered me a brief look up and down, and a fake smile. "But how cute that you should ask."

With my pride squarely ripped from my chest and offered back to me - chopped, sautéed and accompanied with the bill - I begrudgingly took it and walked away.

There were cool kids in every circle, and we had just found ours.

* * *

"You aren't completely disappointed with this afternoon, are you?" asked Stacey, hours later as we watched the lazy Perth sun sink lower on the horizon, turning the water into liquid rose.

Nudging her side, I beamed. "No, it's been fun, I especially loved the food," I said, and gave her a confirming wink, "and look, I sailed with David and Sebastian for a little while, so really, it's been great. Great friends, great weather, great life." I smiled.

Squelching footsteps trod the sand and Stacey and I turned backwards towards the sound. Anna was carefully walking along the beach, soaking wet and somehow, still gorgeous.

I asked, giving her sodden state the once over, "What happened?"

She laughed. "Oh, well…"

Suddenly a very wet Harry came into view, skipping a few steps with his skinny legs to catch up to Anna, and grinning sheepishly when he realised we were staring at them.

"Tip the boat?" asked Stacey.

Harry replied, "Ah, well, that would be a less embarrassing answer…"

"…we fell in," simpered Anna from under her lashes.

"It was my fault, I didn't look at the sail-"

"No, of course it wasn't, I was in your way-"

"You could never be in the way."

"But your sailing, it was faultless."

The flirting was palpable, and I allowed myself the tiniest of nudges to Stacey.

"Re-cip-ro-cation," I muttered, happily.

Oblivious but genuine, Harry stepped closer to us. "I'm so sorry, I didn't hear what you said."

"We're going to get you towels!" I blurted, sharing another look with my best friend and conveying all the conservation we needed.

We left the sandy shore, my soaked sister and her friend-who-is-a-boy talking and giggling away, and strolled the cool, soft grass. Fresh air tickled my skin as David Boas' tall frame fell in step with ours, quietly asking Stacey about whose tongs were whose. An organisational leader is always in demand, she'd told me once, and I knew that she secretly loved being needed. Didn't we all? With my permission, and David to accompany her, she set off to the very important task of cutlery distribution.

My very important task remained unfinished, however.

The bare soles of my feet soon happened upon the hard, sun-warmed bitumen of the parking lot and I'd reached my car and lifted the boot when I heard the two voices that I was beginning to dread.

"My brother can't be serious, can he? Wanting to expand here?"

"Who knows what he's thinking."

I peeked around the boot. The black Land Rover faced my beat-up Holden Monaro and the two maddening people in question were leaning on their car. I pulled back.

My conscience battled within me to stop eavesdropping but my genetic lineage meant that morbid curiosity trumped supposed moral intentions every time. Hands down. It was a simple matter of DNA.

Will continued. "I can't see this place having possibility for him though. The city itself is _small_, the people are backward and entirely resistant to change, and nothing is open past ten o'clock. How successful can he really be in this city?"

Hey, I love my city.

Then the voice changed.

"He won't be. This place is a dump. Besides, the shopping here is horrendous, let me tell you. Their fashions are practically _seasons_ behind the eastern states and okay, I'll give Anna the benefit of the doubt in her plain country girl look… but did you see what that Lisa girl was wearing? My word."

I really needed to start wearing a name tag.

"Someone should tell her that 'T-shirts'" – and she said the word as if it actually tasted horrible to say – "and board shorts are so 'twelve-year-old boy'."

My mouth fell open, but I promptly closed it. I'd spent a good few years of my teenagehood being mistaken for a boy, what with my short hair, lack of puberty and a propensity to finish the day covered in mud, but all those things I'd managed to grow out of. At least, I'd thought so.

Will's quietness momentarily stilled her tirade, but Chrissy was determined to prolong the derision. She continued.

"I know I could never dress so unfashionably, not even for a charity event. I've always had a natural flair for the artistic, people are forever telling me that. "

Her words were met with silence again, he would not bite, and I very almost snuck a peek around the car to have the satisfaction of witnessing her frustrated demeanour.

But, as a woman used to getting her own way, she simply tried another tact.

"Unless.. unless you _like_ her style? I suppose there is a certain appeal to that simple, naïve innocence that small towns produce in their women. Is that what you think of the _eloquent_ Miss Lisa? Have you buckled to her charm?"

"Her name is Elizabeth."

"Oh, is that her name? Thank you for proving my point. Men always make an effort to remember the names of the girls they like."

"Perhaps that's true, but you are wrong in thinking I would be interested in her. I'm not. Quite the contrary. I'll grant that her sister appears sufficiently normal, but Elizabeth is not socially apt enough for me to seriously consider."

My pride smarted again, like a slap in the face, red and raw, but I refused to let the hurt linger. His general attitude of condescension and self-righteousness was more than enough reason to ignore whatever poorly-judged opinions he might hold.

I knew that soon enough, once the sting had passed, I could convince myself of it.

With a snatch, I pulled the two closest towels from my car and slammed the boot, not looking back, striding the hot concrete to the cool of the grass.

* * *

A/N: Ha! I bet you never thought I'd get this far! Two whole chapters - God bless you, you little schnookems who've subscribed to this story. It keeps a poor girl's heart beating over.

Man, I love Chrissy. Anyone else?... Anyone...? *crickets echo*


	3. Chapter 3

"Her sister appears sufficiently normal," I declared in my deepest, manliest voice, arms stretched wide to my audience of an empty bedroom, "but Elizabeth is not socially apt enough for me to… _seriously_…_ consider_."

"Are you still practicing?" asked Anna, walking in with fingers brushing out wet strands of golden hair. "Don't you have to go to work soon?"

"Yes, soon, but not yet," I answered, shooting her a pointed look. "And, I've got to get this right."

Shuffling across a little, I stood before our floor-length mirror and squared my shoulders, attempting to transform my petite 5'7 body into an imposing six-foot-something man.

"…enough for me to seriously… _consider,_" I muttered under my breath as my right arm gestured awkwardly and manly-like.

"Are you sure he didn't know you'd heard? Maybe he wanted to apologise and you left too quickly…" asked Anna from behind the wardrobe door, her worry seeping through her voice as clothes flew onto the bed. Layers built up of skirts and dresses, clearly Anna's; we shared genetics but not a fashion style.

"He wouldn't have apologised, even if he did know," I said, peeking around the door. "That's just the type of guy he is. Awkward. Arrogant. Insulting of perfectly normal females… well, mostly normal... slightly normal. Now," and I spun back to the mirror, "let me finish this. Dad gets home next week and there's no way I'm going to miss a chance to do an impression of Mr. Will -… what's his last name?"

Pulling out a flowery print sundress, Anna held it again herself and raised her eyebrows. "I'm not sure."

A muted little ringing started playing from underneath the pile of crushed clothing and I thrust my arm inside to dig out Anna's phone. Before she could object, I pressed the green button with my posh British accent at the ready.

"Anna's phone."

There was silence on the other end, then finally a shrill female voice.

"Oh _hi_. Can I speak with Anna?"

"Well, you'll need an appointment as she's _very_ busy, you know, what with lunching with the mayor and modelling for Vogue and hugging orphan babies…"

"Oh…uh…"

Anna, who had now dismissed all thoughts of fashion, aimed at me her very fiercest look – which was not very scary – and said, "GivemethephoneLizzie."

I relented, handing it over.

"Uh, hello? This is Anna."

I laughed loudly, being hushed by Anna as she tried to explain to the shrill female voice that her sister was a lunatic and that she wasn't 100% certain that adoption hadn't occurred.

When she hung up, she threw her phone at me. I caught it, impressed at my own agility.

"You are never allowed near my phone again."

"If only I thought you were serious."

"That was Chrissy."

"Chrissy… Bandly?"

"The very same."

"She's crazy-scary. Just so you know."

"Lizzie, she's not that bad."

"I told you what she said about me, right? She said I looked like a boy."

"Yes, but maybe she was just having a bad day. It's hard to make friends in a new town."

"Yeah, it is, especially when you are crazy-scary."

"Oh Liz," she smiled. "She was calling to say sorry that her brother hadn't made it to church yesterday and to invite me over to their house this Friday for lunch…" Anna raised one perfect eyebrow. "So she can't be all bad, can she?"

I grinned, pulling myself up to sit cross-legged and looking up at my sister's sweet smile. "Oh, so it's a ploy! Is a certain blonde haired fellow going to be gracing you with his presence, then?"

Lowering herself next to me, her smile fell a little. "Actually, no. She said Harry would be working…but that's fine, I'm sure I will enjoy my time with just Chrissy."

"I'm surrrrrrre you will," I purred, back with the English accent.

This time Anna threw a pillow at me.

* * *

Harry didn't call Anna during that week, and Stacey's words in my head had never rung more clearly. But Harry was his own man, and he could make his own decisions. If he thought it was necessary to take it slowly with Anna, then I would have to respect that. She didn't need a man in a hurry anyway.

What she did need in a hurry, however, was a quiet house to study in. Why she had chosen to take on extra classes over her summer holidays for her Health Science/Economic double degree was beyond me, though she did once tell Mum that she 'just loves studying'. But when another loan statement arrived in the mail, I began to think she wanted to avoid being a broke student for the rest of her life.

We were both in that situation – of course Mum and Dad didn't have the money to pay upfront – but I had chosen to work in a café over my summer holidays, because come autumn, science would still be science, but I would no longer be poor.

Despite debt and the lowered standard of living required of a student, the only thing I regretted about our whole experience was that Anna and I went to different universities.

"That's why it's called _The_University of Western Australia," Anna teases.

"Come back to me when your students get real world experience," I shoot back.

* * *

The red light on our answering machine flashed steadily and conjured my curiosity. I had earlier tossed my keys on the bench and kicked off my work shoes, letting them fly in a low arc across the kitchen, before falling into one of the chairs as my eyes drifted to the flickering light.

It was Friday already, the week had passed in a blur of working extra shifts and looking after the house and while I'd wanted to grill Anna as soon as I got home about how her 'coffee date' had gone… the house was suspiciously empty. My eyes had moved unbidden towards to home phone.

Reaching across the table, I pressed the play button and smiled wryly as I listened to Anna's voice.

_"Hey Lizzie, I tried your mobile and it rang out and I know you don't check voice mail. Umm, I've had an accident here, oh, I'm still at the Bandleys', and a doctor came and said I've twisted my ankle… I'm such a klutz, I'm so embarrassed Lizzie…. And then Harry and Chrissy offered that I spend the night here because I'm not supposed to move much and I don't really know what to do. Anyway, can you call me when you get this? Love you."_

The message clicked off and remembering that my phone was left on the passenger's seat of my car, I stood up and began to search the house for a cordless phone. After longer than it would have taken to just go to my car and rescue my mobile, I located one in the magazine holder in the lounge room.

_"Hello?"_

"Anna, it's me."

* * *

The warm Australian air held my face between its hands, flying through the open windows of my car. Driving along Stirling Hwy with clothes and toiletries packed for Anna, I squinted against the setting sun and checked the directions I'd hastily written down.

_Stirling Hwy._

_LEFT Leake St. Follow to end. _

_LEFT The Boulevard_

_# 709_

When Anna had given me the address, I worried that plugging in **Start**: Belmont and **Finish**: Peppermint Grove into the internet mapping page would cause a warning message to appear:

_A fatal error has occurred with our programming… since it's extremely unlikely that anyone from Belmont would have associates in Peppermint Grove. Unless you plan to rob them. Do you plan to rob them?_

And up would come two little boxes to check, Yes or No. I choose No!

Crossing the peak hour traffic, I turned into Leake Street and laughed.

"I don't think we're in Kansas City anymore, Toto."

Grand palaces ran along each side of the road, with arching blossoms of Jacaranda flowers creating an ornamental mauve canopy above. Manicured lawns stretched out in front of the houses that weren't completely enveloped in eight foot high fences. Leprechauns pooped money by the side of the road. Saabs and Benzes lazily rolled by, tinted windows hiding Perth's rich and famous.

Leake Street continued and rolling over a hill, the horizon lifted and I met a glowing SwanRiver. The sunset poured an artist's palette of warm colours from the sky onto the water and the twinkling lights of the city were just beginning their nightly demand to be noticed.

I took a left along The Esplanade, counting the mansions

703…705…707…Ah, 709.

Oh, boy.

* * *

Inelegantly, I had pulled half of my body out through the window to press the intercom resting on the side of their huge wrought iron gate.

_"With whom am I speaking?" _rasped the unknown male voice.

"Ummm.. Lizzie Bennet? I'm Anna's sister, I'm just here to-"

_Buzz_.

The large gate began to slide open.

"-drop off… oh. Oh, okay, yeah."

The gear shifted and I carefully followed the paved driveway up towards the house. And by house, I meant glass-encased-three-story-high-mansion-with-river-and-city-views, but you know, semantics.

Pulling the handbrake and shutting off the engine, I stepped out of the Monaro and closed the door with a strong _thud_, the sound echoing in the still night air_._

"Lizzie! So great to see you! How are you going?"

Harry, bubblingness incarnate, had burst out the front door.

"Hi Harry! How are you?"

Hugs.

"I won't stay long, I just wanted to drop these off for Anna…"

"Of course, of course, come in, come in. Have you eaten? Are you hungry? Did you bring bathers? We have a pool, you know…"

And that was how it began, my time at Peppermint Grove's most newly leased mansion.

* * *

I mean, she didn't _really_ need to stay the night. We all knew that. A few painkillers and some instructions, us two girls would have managed just fine, thank you very much.

But.

When a gorgeous blonde-haired, blue-eyed, investment-brokerage-company-executive-owner-(who-actually-knew-what-he-did) feels responsible for the injury that is, in fact, a direct result of nothing more than your own stupid clumsiness and takes it upon himself to be your very own personal assistant, well, you don't refuse. Ever.

As least, that's my general rule.

And this is what Anna and I had decided over the phone. I would bring her some overnight supplies, she would rest in comfort and the two love birds could spend a little extra time together. Everyone wins.

Then Harry had his wonderful idea.

Whilst sitting in the spacious lounge room in relative awkwardness with the two infatuates, plus Chrissy and Will (I had managed polite pleasantries in their direction and nothing more), Harry jumped up.

"Lizzie, I've just thought of it, why don't you stay the night as well? There are certainly enough rooms and I'm sure Anna would appreciate having her sister around, wouldn't you Anna?"

Anna smiled shyly, leaning forward, her injured leg wrapped in an icepack and propped up on the coffee table. "It would be lovely, but are you sure that it's okay?"

"Of course. What do you think Lizzie?

A rapidly composed list of all potential logistical problems ran through my brain.

"It sounds wonderful Harry but I'm not sure, I have to work tomorrow…"

"Oh."

"And no doubt it would be too much to ask Elizabeth to return home again to collect her things," Will spoke, fiddling with his watch.

His tone, his body language… he disliked the idea, which made the prospect of staying all the more sweeter.

"Actually Will," I said, looking him in the eye with mischief, "I wouldn't have to, I could just use Anna's."

Harry clapped his hands together. "Marvellous!"

"But Lizzie, darling," Chrissy soothed, jumping on the get-Lizzie-to-stay-the-heck-away band wagon, "wouldn't you need your _own_ change of clothes?"

And then she smiled at me sweetly… that is, 'aspartame sugar' sweetly – artificial and carcinogenic.

"No problem. I got some clothes in my car…"

Chrissy shot me a sceptical look and folded her arms, barely glancing at the designer jewellery adorning her wrist. I shrugged. "I'm a uni student, I practically live out of my car."

Chrissy rolled her eyes and Will glared at me, but Harry beamed and nodded enthusiastically.

"So, you're staying?"

"I'm staying."

* * *

"Hey cripple, shove over," I said to Anna, as I jumped into the bed. Harry had offered me my own room, but with Anna having a double bed and the thought of her being in pain, I refused, content to sleep beside my sister.

Making sure Anna was comfortable, I huddled down into the sheets and looked at her, our eyes conveying everything.

"He's wonderful, isn't he?"

"He's fantastic Anna, one of the good guys."

She broke out into a wide grin and squeezed her eyes shut. Finally, she relaxed her face and sighed.

"I think I'm falling in love, Lizzie."

"Gosh, I sure hope so, why waste a perfectly good twisted ankle on some boy you merely _like_."  
She giggled. "Oh Lizzie." Then she faltered. "But I'm sorry that it's awkward for you seeing Will."

"Pfft," I dismissed, tossing my hand back, "never mind him, I live for the moments of one's superior. Besides, I have to leave early tomorrow morning, and then you're coming home in the afternoon so I probably won't even have to see him again."

"Maybe ever," mused Anna, her voice heavy with sleep. I smiled.

"We can only hope Anna, we can only hope."

* * *

A/N - Shout out to the uni students whose entire lives fit in their cars.


	4. Chapter 4

The stained black apron came off with a _whoosh_ and I roughly yanked my wavy brown hair out from under the hat. I sighed as I ran my fingers through it, teasing out the knots.

The opening shift, plus a busy lunch rush meant that all energy had been exhausted. It was 2:34 pm and I was ready to go home. Hopefully the Bandlys had dropped Anna off already so I wouldn't have to deal with Mr. Will Snotface.

Yes, snotface. It's hard to be creative after eight hours on your feet.

Prompted by Anna's earlier words, I checked my phone.

**"You have one new voice mail."**

Anna.

_"Hi Lizzie, it's me… so, there's been a change in plans…" _

And that was how it continued, my time at Peppermint Grove's most newly leased mansion.

* * *

"Oh, would you look at her…" Chrissy muttered from across the room, not intended for my ears of course, but reaching them nonetheless.

A moment of awkwardness ensued. I'd been ushered into the foyer of the Grand Palace by Darron the Butler, the man on the intercom, and then finally into the sitting room. Yes, they had a sitting room.

For sitting.

Very practical.

But indeed before me, sat Chrissy Bandly, reading her magazine, and stood Will What's-his-name, modelling the disinterested look, and neither of them seemed eager to chat.

"Did you roll in the dirt, Lizzie?" asked Chrissy.

"Uh…" I must have looked as confused as I felt because Chrissy looked me up and down. My eyes followed her gesture.

Coffee. Dark, grainy streaks were smeared on my white shirt while more lingered on the sides of my pants…plus, dried milk from when Joanna had knocked over the jug, the remnants of a dropped Tandoori Chicken Wrap and the rinsed splashback of cheesy lasagna. I realized my hair was probably just as messy. But I smiled and shrugged.

"All in a days work, I suppose."

The room filled with silence, an uncomfortable restlessness drifting amongst us. Metaphorical crickets echoed.

"How was your work then?" Will offered.

"Busy," I said politely "Busy and exhausting..." And I paused, _trying_ to stretch the conversation into more than three seconds. "What do you do?"

**_Look at how he dresses Lizzie, think of his attitude towards Perth_**… **_as_** **_if he works. He probably just inherited a fortune when he turned eighteen._**

"I mean, you have a job, right?"

He hesitated. "Yes, I do."

I nodded, waiting for him to continue. He didn't. Tumbleweed rolled by.

"… in what area?"

"Will owns a large mining company up north," said Chrissy, finally looking up from her magazine and coming to stand by him. "He's _terribly_ important." She sighed, offering Will another of her saccharine smiles. There were way too many sing-song words in her sentences for a normal human being's speech.

"_And_ he's in Perth _on holiday_, if you can believe it, using his time off to help Harry. Will's _such_ a good friend."

The woman patted Will on the chest.

Will looked uncomfortable, or maybe just bored, or possibly condescending, I didn't actually care. He stared at me with his dark blue eyes and it was clear that I had to get out of there before I gauged out my internal organs with a spoon.

"Is Anna around?"

"Oh, of course, she's outside. Come through."

Chrissy rolled her eyes and sat back down with her magazine, but Will headed out past the foyer and I had to skip a step to keep up with his long legs.

"They are out the back, by the pool."

"Cheers, big ears," I replied.

Will slowed, his frowning eyes watching as I passed him.

"Wait a moment."

I turned back, looking up; his eyes were searching my face. Slowly, he brushed his fingers against my bare arm. Pulling his hand back, he held the palm before me for a moment. Our eyes fell together, spying the small brown granules decorating his skin. Just as quickly, it was dusted away.

"Coffee," was all he said.

Oh, great.

"Uh… thanks," I mumbled.

Weirdo.

* * *

"Clearly you're doing it rough, Anna," I said as my sister reclined on a lawn chair by the oversized pool, Harry passing her an elaborate tropical drink. I exited the long, glass sliding doors and stepped out into the bright sunshine, treading the expansive manicured lawn.

"Lizzie! Oh, Harry's been such a sweetie…"

"It's nothing, you're a very delightful patient."

I chuckled, watching them, and knelt beside Anna. "So you're staying another night?"

Harry hurriedly interjected. "Well, when we heard that your family was away, and that Anna would be alone in your home while you were at work… Lizzie, I just couldn't have that on my conscience, not since Anna fell at _my_ house. At least if she's here, there is always someone who can help her…"

Did I mention my general rule of what to do when a gorgeous blonde-haired, blue-eyed, investment-brokerage-company-executive-owner takes it upon himself to be your very own _caretaker_? Well, the proper course of action is very similar to that of my previous general rule.

"That sounds very practical, Harry," I assured him.

"And you'll stay as well, won't you Lizzie?"

I hesitated. "Well…"

His eyes were like those of puppy dogs. Curse him and his infinite cuteness.

"I'd love to."

* * *

Stepping back out into the sunlight, I readjusted my sunglasses to block the glare from the shimmering pool. Anna had requested I join her, and since Anna was the infirmed guest-of-honour – what she wanted, Harry made sure she got. He even offered me a pair of Chrissy's bathers (she was super excited about that prospect) and asked Darron the Butler to make me a sandwich while I cleaned up. I had to admit, it was a great plan.

Everyone had found their way to the poolside when I emerged, but I sought out Anna, laying myself down on the lounge chair beside her.

"How was work?" whispered Anna.

"Really busy. Stupidly busy. They-need-to-hire-more-staff busy. Ugh, I'm tired."

She shone forth a beautiful sympathetic smile.

"I'm sorry to hear that, Lizzie. Maybe it will get better soon."

"Maybe."

"Do you always come home covered in that much food, Lizzie?" crooned Chrissy, from across the pool. Perhaps Chrissy just had some kind of genetic anomaly that made it physically impossible for pleasant tones to come out of her mouth… so I shouldn't judge her.

I smiled. "Often yes, although sometimes I'm covered in strange hydrocarbon creations instead."

Chrissy stared at me blankly.

"Lizzie is studying Science at Curtin University," explained Anna, from behind me.

"Oh. Well, I suppose an education is important, it does widen one's field for potential husbands…"

I blinked, stunned.

Did she just say that out loud?

**_I think she did._**

I'd said something like that once, and while I'd said it, I held a serious face for all of half a millisecond and then burst out laughing. I looked to Chrissy. She was not laughing.

Apparently Women's Lib wasn't as alive as I'd thought.

"Will, darling, how _is_ Fiona doing these days? I haven't seen her in _forever_ and I do wish I could visit your estate again some time soon and see her."

"She's doing well, thank you for asking. She continues to study by correspondence and will turn 17 in May."

"Who is Fiona?" I asked, head turning in curiosity.

Will sat forward and opened his mouth to speak, but Chrissy eagerly interjected.

"Will's charming sister, oh she's so lovely, such a _catch_."

"Is she a fish?" I asked dryly.

Harry let out a goofy laugh.

"No, Lizzie, I mean she is an extremely good marriage prospect for any successful man of society," Chrissy said and realising that Will had shot her a glowering look, composed herself and finished with, "…when she's old enough, of course."

Watching their interaction, I lurched forward. "Humour me, but what exactly makes a girl an 'extremely good marriage prospect'?"

"Well, Will is a successful man of society, perhaps _he_ could humour you with an answer…"

Will, having tried to feign an air of indifference, finally sat forward and spoke slowly, with conviction.

"She must be intelligent, cultured and aware of current world events-"

"And sophisticated, in her dress and speech," Chrissy took over, tossing her blonde hair over her shoulder with a careless hand. "Well-travelled, a lover of the fine arts and music, gifted in the culinary arts as well, has an eye for style and an instinct for class…"

"… and possess with an inquisitive mind," Will finished.

"And you expect to find all of that in one woman?" I asked incredulously.

"It can be done," smirked Chrissy, folding her arms and reclining back into the chair. The conversation fell and I turned to Anna, before Will's voice pulled me back.

"Surely you could find them in many men."

"Excuse me?"

"The attributes. If not in women, surely you could find them in many men."

Did _he_ just say that out loud?

**_I think he did._**

"You mean, the 'successful men of society'?"

"Some, yes."

"Well, if you happen to come across any, let me know, us mere females are in desperate need of tuition."

Will's expression remained neutral and I stood, offering a fake smile. Then, for the second time that week, I walked away from that man, fuming.

* * *

A/N - Just saw the movie trailer for The Book Thief and started bawling.


	5. Chapter 5

"Anna, he drives me crazy and I'm gonna hit him."

In the middle of the Bandly's kitchen, Anna's hand rested on my stomach, holding me back. Yes, I let the cripple have the sound mind. I munched furiously on my sandwich and bristled.

"Maybe try to stay on neutral topics, if you can," offered my reasonable sister.

I hurriedly swallowed, passion pervading my veins yet again. "Neutral? Neutral?! Will can find a way to… rip away electrons from a noble gas!"

Anna paused, then smiled, "…that was a good one."

"Thanks."

"Please try to be nice, I don't want Harry to feel uncomfortable, especially since it's his house and we are his guests, Lizzie…"

"_Harry_, I can be nice to. But Will…" I groaned melodramatically and stomped my foot. "Oh, alright…" I grumbled. Anna sighed, relieved, and I followed the hobbling girl on crutches back out into the sunshine.

My mind determined, I was resolved.

**_Don't talk to him. Don't talk to Will._**

I most certainly will not, brain.

And for the rest of the afternoon, we barely said three words to each other.

The evening, however, proved to be a much different situation. Harry and Anna were inconspicuously snuggled on the couch, pouring over his family photos. Chrissy had gone upstairs to take a shower and Will... well, he was standing over the kitchen counter, cutting vegetables… for the dinner that he was making.

_That_ was somewhat unexpected.

"Do you often cook?" I asked him without thinking.

**_Why are you talking to him, Lizzie? You_** **_could have innocently ignored him, feigned interest in Harry's family photos or coffee table books or wall art or anything else but pretty much…_**

But pretty much I'm like a kid with a scab – just can't leave it alone.

The chopping stopped briefly as Will's blue eyes shot to me. After a moment, the chopping restarted.

"No. I don't usually have time but I-"

"Darlings, I've had the best idea," interrupted Chrissy, descending the stairs - hair, face, dress, all perfect. "Movie night. Tonight. Popcorn, chocolate, icecream… Let's do it."

Will glanced at me slyly and whispered, "She's not going to eat any of those foods."

Stunned, I watched as he returned to his chopping. Did Will Snotface just make a joke? Or, at least, a comment on society? Or, at the very least, a comment that undermined a pretence? Well, that was somewhat unexpected too.

* * *

"...so then he said 'No, I have four discount cards, I should get 40% off' and then I said, 'do you really want me to give you a Grade 5 Maths lesson right here in the café...? Because four cards at 10% each is still 10%."

Harry burst out laughing and Anna grinned. Chrissy looked vaguely amused and Will... he was just one black hole of an eternal mystery. Was he happy? Was he bored? I had no idea.

The meal was, I was reluctant to admit, kind of delicious and as we sat around empty dishes and soiled plates, Harry leant on one elbow and asked, "Did you really say that to him? About a Grade 5 Maths lesson?"

"Yes! Although I couldn't be sure at what age they taught percentages…."

"I suppose some people find Maths very difficult," said Harry.

"And pointless," muttered Chrissy.

"Are you accustomed to finding fault in all your customers?"

My head spun to Will and I paused for a moment, watching him. I leant back and smiled.

"Only those that are particularly ridiculous… which are many."

Will frowned. "Many?"

"They're everywhere. Perhaps I would even find fault in you… you know, if you were my customer."

"Oh, do tell us what you would think about Will, Lizzie!" Harry said.

"Lizzie…" said Anna in a tone that suggested what she really meant to say was, 'Will's Harry's friend, please don't offend him."

"Don't worry Anna," I smiled, "I'll be nice. Let's think… a fault. Do you tip well, Will?"

"Yes."

"And push your chair in when you leave a table?"

He nodded, "I believe so."

"And treat your waitress like a human being, no matter how underpaid and potentially awkward she may be?"

Will's eyes narrowed for a moment, not unkindly, before he spoke. "I pay for good service and I expect nothing less."

"But that's all she is to you, then? Service?"

"You can't find fault in how Will treats his inferiors," interrupted Chrissy, coming to his defence, "He's a very fair employer."

"Is that so, Will?"

"I give my staff the benefit of the doubt, yes, unless proven otherwise. If they are found to be dishonest, however, of course I will terminate their employment immediately."

I stilled for a moment as our eyes met.

"I suppose I cannot find fault in that." I looked to Harry. "He is a model customer then."

"Bravo!" cried Harry, with applause, to no one in particular.

* * *

The next morning, my old car fought the good fight to find a parking spot in the shade, and failed. Not even 9am and it was already hot.

I pulled into a sunny bay as the hand break voiced a shuddering squeak and I turned down the radio. One benefit of driving to church alone was that no one could complain about the level of music. I had chosen to set it to _cranking_.

Two minutes later and I was sitting on the wall by the entrance, with my two 10-year-old buddies, Caleb and Ben, swinging my legs back and forth in time with them.

"Oh, here's Anna, I gotta run. Catchya kiddos."

"Bye, Lizzie!"

I flung myself off the wall, recovered quickly, and strolled over to meet Anna and Harry. Will and Chrissy had tagged along, looking miserable, but present nevertheless. Our merry party of five were welcomed by ushers and led to a row of empty seats. It is certainly amazing the choice of seating available when you don't arrive thirty minutes late. After a dash of cunning manipulation, I sat on the end of the row, next to Anna, who was next to Harry, then Will and Chrissy. Perfect.

* * *

With none of my extra sisters to act ridiculous and scare away the general public, Harry was able to meet many of the young adults at our church. Granted, they were namely of the female variety, but as Anna's sworn protector, I wouldn't let them get too ahead of themselves.

_He's taken, ladies, but you can watch from afar._

Eventually, it was time for our two parties to go our separate ways.

While Anna was saying goodbye, I wandered to the car, opened all the doors and stood in the shade to wait. After a few moments, I faced the heat box that is my car, sat down in the driver's seat and turned the ignition. It revved a few times, but then steam began to emanate from the engine.

I quickly clicked off the ignition and sat back, dejected.

The last time this had happened, Dad had been able to pick me up, but right now Mum and Dad would be still on the road, coming home. I didn't own membership to the RAC and I really didn't want to spend a whole lot of money on a taxi. The car would start again when the weather cooled in the evening, but until then, Anna and I were stranded.

I leant my head against the steering wheel and closed my eyes, chastising myself for owning such an unreliable car.

"Is there a problem, Elizabeth?"

The voice belonged to the man that I really didn't want to have to deal with right now.

"Go away," I whispered.

"Excuse me?"

Raising my head, I looked up at him. "I said, 'My car's overheated.'"

"Oh... although it doesn't surprise me, the car looks like its seen better days."

Well, you can guess what happened next… I got out of the car, slammed the door and punched Will Snotface in the face, letting out all my aggression and anger in one single blow.

Okay. I didn't. But I wished I had.

"I love my car. Don't knock it."

"Lizzie," called Anna, approaching me, Harry loyally following behind. "Is everything alright?"

Well, _now_ you can guess what happened next… Harry saw his damsel in distress and offered to drive us home, in _air conditioning_. At this point… you remember my general rule, right?

_Yes you can drive us home. Oh, you want to take us out to a fancy restaurant for lunch too, sure, why not? And how do you feel about fathering Anna's unborn children as well?_

More or less.

By the time we were actually driven home, the lazy sun still held high in the sky, despite the lateness of afternoon. I suppressed a yawn as the suburbs changed, from neat green lawns with bordered gardens to dead lawns with a mess of overhead power lines. We were almost home.

As we pulled up to a stop sign, a group of four or five youths emerged from behind a shrub.

Suddenly, as if on cue, they threw something at the car.

_Splat. Splat-splat._

Eggs.

Classy.

Then, while Harry and the Crazies were still in shock, the youths took off down a back thoroughfare. Watching them go however, I spotted a familiar shirt… and then two familiar running styles.

"Jenny-freakin-Bennet," I hissed to the window, livid.

Anna turned back from the front seat to look at me, disappointed.

"Really?"

"Yep," I replied, barely holding back the anger under my skin. "And Shannon."

"You know some of them?" Chrissy asked, disgust dripping from her voice.

"Yeah. They're my sisters."

* * *

I stormed out of the car when we arrived in the driveway.

"Dad!" I drew a deep breath to gain some perspective. "Firstly, welcome back. Secondly, you need to know what your daughters have been up to…"

He had been out the front, fixing the reticulation so that, as least, we could be one house on the street without dead lawn, and listened patiently as I ranted about the current misbehaviours of his younger daughters. Mum appeared moments later, walking out of the front door in her old clothes and exceptionally frizzled hair. Before I could ask her how exactly she planned to discipline the fruit of her womb, she raced to the Land Rover, gushing over her injured daughter.

As introductions were made, the exact moment Mum realized that this was the Harry Bandly of Bandly Investments, we lost all hope of getting good sense from her.

"Oh _Harry_, how generous of you to open your house to my mere girls," Mum said, and then leant over to whisper in Harry's ear, yet failing to lower her volume. "Lord knows Lizzie could benefit from some of your sophisticated influence, and that of your friends."

I sighed in frustration as Chrissy's smirk grew.

"But Anna, of course, has always been so elegant and refined in her ways, don't you think, Harry?"

Anna blushed as I shot a pleading look to Dad, his attention focussed on adjusting a spring in the sprinkler in his hands.

"She is very elegant, yes."

"MUM!" a voice called from down the road, momentarily disrupting the mortification currently taking place in our driveway. "You'll never in a million years guess what kind of car we egg-… oh."

Jenny stopped abruptly, Shannon crashing into her from behind, as running towards us, they had failed to notice the shiny black, and now in places, yellow, Land Rover in front of our house. Jenny inched backwards quickly, bumping into Shannon again. "Nice-to-meet-you-but-I-got-to-go!"

"Not so fast, Jenny," Dad commanded and she skulked back towards us, like a petulant child called back to finish her dinner. A moment later, though, she saw Harry and her face picked up.

"Harry!" and she embraced him affectionately, now knowing that she wouldn't see the punishment to her actions any time soon. She had a way of making males believe that she'd never do a thing wrong ever again.

But in any case, Harry, of course, wouldn't respond in any way but at joy in seeing a sister of Anna. Shannon, sensing the danger had passed, approached the group too and more introductions followed, complete with another full explanation as to what had happened with Anna's ankle.

"But Anna, you got to stay in his mansion? That's not fair, I want to see it."

"Jenny!" I scolded.

"Me too, I want to see it," whined Shannon.

Nine days apart, twelve minutes together, and I was tiring of my family already.

"I should have a housewarming party," said Harry, the stunning brilliance of his realisation growing bright in his eyes. With a second thought, he turned to Chrissy. "Is that a good idea?"

"Do it next weekend," cried Jenny as Chrissy rolled her eyes.

"That's too soon to organise a party," Anna gently reminded her.

"In two weeks, then," chuffed Jenny and grinning wildly from person to person.

"Next month," spoke Chrissy, staring down at Jenny.

Harry enthusiastically agreed to the plan and confessed that his number of friends in Perth was limited. "Maybe you could invite some people from your church? Or any friends you have?"

Will, silent during the exchange, cleared his throat and I hated that I understood his meaning.

"He means respectable friends, Jenny."

Jenny just giggled and threw her arms around Harry's waist.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you! A party, I can't wait."

With a carefully choreographed hand to Harry's shoulder, Chrissy sighed and said, "Well, it's getting late …"

"Oh. Yes," Harry answered, "you're right. It was wonderful to meet you all, you are such a vivacious family, full of life…"

"That's one way to put it," Chrissy muttered, as hugs were exchanged and farewells wished. They piled into the car and we all waved as the big black somewhat-shiny Land Rover pulled out of our driveway and drove away.

And that was how it ended, the most awkward weekend of my life.

* * *

A/N - Guess who's coming in the next chapter? Everyone.

P.S. I still love Chrissy the most these days... "And pointless." - how funny is she?


	6. Chapter 6

"Okay, I have you down as two large English Breakfast Teas, both with milk, one small Earl Grey Tea, without milk and one small hot chocolate, with marshmallows, is that correct?"

The elderly lady before me paused for a second, then turned to her equally elderly friend. "That is right, isn't it Margaret? What did Barbara order? Was it a large or a small? Ladies! Come here for a moment…"

I sighed, and looked down at the growing line of waiting customers. In front of me, the ladies continued their discussion about what they'd ordered. Finally, the leader, Bea, confirmed their order was correct.

"Great, that comes to $17.65."

"Girls, this one is on me."

"No, Bea, you paid last time, this is my shout," said Barbara.

"I've got this one," spoke Old Lady #4, wrinkled hands reaching into her coin purse.

"Ladies," interrupted a man from behind me, in his early twenties sporting a uniform just like mine. (For a brief moment, he looked down and shot me a grin, and boy, did he have a gorgeous smile.) "How about this, I'm very willing to accept each of your contributions _personally,_ that way, you can all feel satisfied that you've paid on this occasion. It's what your grandchildren would want. "

The old ladies first giggled, then gushed, ferociously rushing to dig out their brag books full of photos.

While they were distracted, Barbara handed me money and I cashed it through the till. Promising to see their photos as soon as he had time, the women left with their table number, and I turned to face this new guy.

"Jimmy, at your service," he said with a sly grin, hand outstretched. I took it.

"Lizzie, totally your boss right now."

"Hey, I'm okay with a woman in charge."

I smiled widely. "Then you'll fit right in…"

* * *

I collapsed on my bed that night, content.

"All is right with the world, Anna."

"Did you meet someone?" enquired Anna, slightly preoccupied with tidying the room.

"Yes. And no. It's not what you think. They finally hired someone new at the café and he's perfect. He's worked in hospitality before, so we don't have to train him, he's smart so he's picked up all the codes already and… well... he's just plain fun to be around. All the customers love him, because he charms their socks off - but in a really sweet way, and he's got this cute smile… I can just tell that the next month is going to be good."

Anna watched me now. "He sounds wonderful."

"Oh, he is!" I rolled onto my stomach and rested my head on my palms. "This was his first job in Perth, so he probably doesn't know anybody… do you reckon I should invite him to Harry's party?"

Anna thought for a moment and then nodded. "Yeah, that would be a really nice thing to do."

I smiled again. I couldn't stop.

Jimmy. I wonder what role you are going to play in my life…

"It's not fair!" stormed in Shannon, the door loudly hitting the wall with her effort.

"What isn't, Shannon?" asked Anna – who, unlike myself, apparently _could_ care less about the dramas of our sisters – as Jenny followed her in, equally upset.

"Some friend of dad's is coming to stay here and instead of making him sleep on the floor in the family room–"

"Which is where he should sleep!" spat out Jenny, indignant hands on hips.

"–Dad's kicking Mary out and she's sleeping on the floor in our room."

"Ugh, three weeks with Sister Righteous."

"Be nice, Jenny," I warned. "Who is this guy? When's he coming?"

"I think his name is Warren," answered Mary, walking in and taking the grand total to five girls in one small room. "An accountant from Adelaide. He works for a big company and they sent him over here for a conference and training or something. I heard that he had the option of accepting hotel accommodation for the three weeks, but he told them that he had close friends in Perth and that it would be a worthwhile opportunity to spend time with them."

Even Mary's tone held some bitterness.

"Well, why doesn't he stay with those friends?" I asked, confused.

"We _are_ those friends."

"But we don't even know him! How does he know Dad?"

"That's the thing, Dad spent a week with him at a conference ten years ago. Dad hardly remembers him!"

"This is craziness."

"Dad thinks so too, but… what else can he do?"

"Uh, send his deluded butt back to Adelaide?" Jenny taunted.

We all agreed.

At least the future arrival of Warren Weirdo had worked to unite us, five sisters in mutual disdain for an unknown stranger.

* * *

"Chardonnay, for the lady… nice manly beer for the gentleman," said Jimmy as he set down the drinks in front of me. Earlier that day, Jimmy had asked if trainee waiters were allowed to ask out their beautiful and demanding trainer waitresses for drinks. I smiled at his tactics.

"I see through your ploy, Mr. Reilly."

"I knew you would be too smart for my devices. But is that a 'yes'?"

"Yes, but only for one drink," I'd reasoned, "and only to celebrate the end of another crazy Saturday shift."

It wasn't a date, and we certainly weren't a couple... but, you know, it was nice to have some uncomplicated male attention for awhile, even if it was in the buzzing hotel close to work. He shot me one of his killer smiles as he edged in beside me on the couch.

"Cheers!" he cried, holding up his beer.

"Cheers," I said, taking a sip of the dry drink. I waited a moment, before turning into his boss again. "So, Jimmy, tell me everything I want to know."

"And what is that?" he asked with one eyebrow raised and a smirk.

"What were you doing before you got to Perth?"

"Oh, this and that."

I shot him a look.

"Vague, huh? It's only because my life is not really that interesting. I finished school, tried university – wanted to study Commerce, but hey, didn't work out," and he laughed, but with a hint of sadness coating his tone. "Had a few desk jobs, but again, wasn't anything I enjoyed… so I packed up and went north, did some fruit picking, some bartending... you know, the life of a wanderer. Eventually made my way here to sunny Perth. It's a great city, I don't know why some people think badly of it…"

"They look down on our 'backward ways', I imagine," I contributed, recalling Will's disgust.

"Nonsense, it's those 'backwards ways' and values that established this nation into what it is today."

Heck, I could have married him on that declaration alone.

"I completely agree."

* * *

Jimmy was on his third beer by the time I had finished my drink. When he enquired if I wanted another, I decided on a softie, and assured him I wanted to be perfectly sober for the drive home. I had no idea how Jimmy intended to travel home, but he didn't own a car, so drinking too much didn't seem to be a problem for him.

As Jimmy left me on the couch and went to order another beer, I watched him. Shaggy light brown hair hung past his collar and a shirt that stretched across his shoulders, torn jeans, black and white Converse sneakers … very nice. Very cute. I definitely wanted to know this guy better.

Jimmy turned from the bar, and carrying our drinks over, looked at me and winked. I smiled back. But then his eyes moved past me, and his face fell. Confused, I followed the direction of his gaze.

_You've got to be kidding me._

…Will?

What was he doing here?

Of all the bars in all the Perths…

Then Will spotted Jimmy.

I had no trouble deciding what expression Will was modelling this time…anger.

Movement stole my vision for a moment and I spied Harry next to him, facing in the opposite direction and chatting away happily with some stranger, completely oblivious to the exchange. Will still wore a face of fury.

I looked back to where Jimmy had stood, but he was gone.

"Here we go," said Jimmy happily, now suddenly at my side, placing drinks on the table.

I jumped. "Oh, you surprised me, I thought you were-… anyway. Thanks."

Jimmy sat down and non-chalantly began to talk about some bartending job he'd had in Brisbane, when I peeked a look back at Will.

I quickly looked away. He'd been staring at _me_ this time, that same expression haunting his features.

"… was a good gig, we'd work until late-"

"Sorry, I don't mean to interrupt," I started, halting Jimmy, "…but… what just happened?"

Jimmy sighed, leant back on the couch and gave a wry grin.

"You noticed, huh?"

"It was hard not to."

"Do you know him?"

"Will? Yeah, well, we've met a few times, but I wouldn't say we're friends."

"That's probably best… if you really want to hear what I've got to tell you, you might ended up despising the man."

Little did Jimmy know that I was already there. I brushed my hand out, signalling him to fire away.

"My family had lived in a small country town while I was growing up. Dad had been working for Will's dad, Tony, in one of their small local offices and life was great, real cosy.

But, eventually Dad got the 'big promotion' so Mum, Dad, Bel and I had to pack up and move to the city.

Tony took a special interest in our family, maybe because I heard somewhere that he himself had been raised in a small country town before hitting the big smoke, I don't know. But anyway, Tony was great, giving me bits of business insight when I'd come visit him, asking what I thought about situations and then talking through what he was going to do. He was kinda like a second father to me, like my 'business father', if that makes any sense?"

I nodded, thoroughly interested.

"He'd wanted me to go to university and study Commerce, because he thought I had a knack for making money. I mean I wanted to study as well, it was a bit like a joint project for us… the 'Get-Jimmy-Through-Uni' campaign." Jimmy smiled sadly. "I was just into my first semester at ACU in Sydney when Tony had a heart attack."

"Oh no!" I blurted, biting my lip, a sense of dread foreshadowing what he might say.

"It was horrible, they did everything they could but still couldn't save him. I was a mess, Lizzie, his death cut me deep. Unfortunately, during the last month of the semester, my grades suffered from it and you would know, that's when they hold the exams that are worth the most. I'd been doing rather well until then, but because of my grief, I didn't pass a lot of my units.

"I thought things would be fine, that I could take the units again next semester, but then Will…" Jimmy shook his head, pain toughening his expression. "Well, I thought we'd been like brothers. Maybe he changed when he had to take over the company, I don't know... You see, Tony had been sponsoring me financially while I studied and I had assumed that Will would honour that, since it was his _father's_ wish and not just mine…"

"He didn't?" I asked incredulously.

Jimmy gave a rueful smile. "Nah. Once he found out I'd failed some units, that was it. Scholarship over. I tried to explain that it was because of my grief and that next semester would be different… but he wouldn't listen."

I was without words. I shook my head. Finally, I simply said, "That man is horrible."

"Oh, Lizzie, if only that were all."

"There's more? What could he possibly do worse than that?"

He leant closer to me, intent on sharing a deep secret and I mirrored the action.

"Will may have disowned me, but he kept ties with my sister, Belinda. Tony had given her a job as a secretary at the company before he passed, and when Will became boss, well… there's no polite way to put it… they started having an affair.

In secret, of course, because he was her boss… but, Lizzie, then she got pregnant. It all changed after that. She said Will used to be caring and sweet, but when she told him of her situation, he grew so angry with her and refused to help. Denied ever having relations with her. Finally when the child was born, he was forced to admit the part he played… but he was a big-shot executive now, with an illegitimate child, so he bought her silence with a large cheque and sent her off to Cairns, far away from anyone he knows. Even his little sister ignored Bel when she got pregnant, and they used to be so tight… it was horrible."

That was enough. That was all I could take. If there were to be any other shocking scandals involving Will then I might just jump up and slap him. And scream at him. And call him ridiculous names and shout out his indiscretions in front of everyone at the bar. In front of Harry.

Jimmy looked at me, unsure. I felt for him, he'd just divulged his troubled past and now needed affirmation. I rested my hand on his. "Thank you for telling me everything."

He smiled sadly, wrapping his fingers around mine.

"You can see why I don't want you to be friends with him, I don't want him to use you like he did, Belinda."

"Oh, don't worry about me, he's going to get a-whole-lot-of-angry from me if he thinks about coming my way."

"That's my girl!"

"You wanna get out of here?"

"Yeah."

Jimmy grinned and rose to leave as I followed suit. As we wound our way of the bar, I shot a glance at Will, and laughed. He was still staring at me, fuming. It was a nice change.

* * *

A/N - So, the other day, a pretty good-looking guy comes into the cafe I work at and sits on his own with a coffee (which, firstly, doesn't happen AT ALL because my cafe is a beacon for rich young couples *shakes head*). Then he gets out a novel and proceeds to read for the next hour.

A cute guy, on his own, reading.

And the whole time I am thinking, 'THIS IS HOW GREAT STORIES START...'

I got quite excited.

Did I work up the courage to interrupt him and ask what book he was reading?... no. *shakes head*

Then he left.

Sigh.


	7. Chapter 7

Sunday morning arrived all too soon.

"Lizzie…"

Anna. Beloved sister.

"Shhh," I muttered, my face squished against the pillow, "no talkie-talkie, it's time for sleepy-sleepy."

"Lizzie, you need to get up or you're going to be late."

"And clearly that's never happened before," I yawned, rubbing my eyes roughly before being game to open them properly.

"Come on, I'll help you," offered Anna as she pulled my groggy body from the bed and pushed me toward the cupboard. "What were you even doing last night? I didn't hear you come in. Pick one."

I was presented with my pile of folded shirts.

Grunting, I pointed to a brown fitted shirt.

"Good." Anna opened the wardrobe. "Now pick another."

Grunting again, I pointed to a cream skirt.

"Good job, Lizzie-loo!" she mocked me, smiling.

"Enough You," I finally said, my voice heavy with sleep.

"Arms up," Anna ordered and I obeyed. She helped me out of the shirt I'd slept in

"I went out for a drink with Jimmy." And then I smiled. "Jimmy."

Now the brown shirt was over my head.

"And you'll never guess who I saw there."

Pyjama pants down.

"Who?" Anna mumbled while trying to manoeuvre pants legs off my resistant grounded feet.

"Will Snotface."

"Will who?"

"Snotface. Will, friend of Harry. Enemy of all creatures good."

One step. Two step. Hula dance while Anna pulled up the cream skirt.

"Oh, did you say hello to him?... Phew. You're dressed, sunshine."

Now face-to-face, she looked at me. I looked back at her. "He's not just a snob, Anna, he's purebred awful."

"Give me the abridged version," she said, grabbing a hair brush.

So I did. And by the time my hair was pulled into a high ponytail and we were in the foyer, Anna knew the whole story.

"I just can't believe a friend of Harry's could behave so cruelly. Perhaps, well, perhaps Jimmy was mistaken…or _something_…"

"Nope, Anna, he's just a bad man."

I allowed Anna to pass, then stepping out into the daylight, I turned to see why my waiting family was so quiet.

"Hello, I'm Warren Beally, and you must be Elizabeth, we didn't meet last night because you came home at a much too unreasonable hour."

The lanky man before me stuck out his hand. And I shook it, chuckling. This man had a sense of humour at least, even if he dressed as if he'd been attacked by a dye wholesaler – fire engine red pleated shorts, burnt orange, short-sleeved, collared shirt. Purple vest. Blue suede shoes. Don't get me wrong, I love colour but this was… a little too colourful, and terribly clashing.

And then my vision rose to his face.

Oh.

He was serious. I searched desperately for the tiniest glimpse of teasing. None.

And, as a consequence, now it seemed like I was staring at him - mesmerized by his way with people, no doubt.

I broke his gaze and scratched my head.

"Yes, I really must work on that, one drink and I'm making out with the next man I walk into."

Mum glared at me – I didn't see her of course, but I could discern that warm glow of her fiery wrath anywhere – while Dad quietly chortled.

I sighed.

"That's our Lizzie," saved Dad, wrapping his arm around Warren's shoulder and leading him to the car, "she says these things to make you laugh, because you know, it's so far from the truth that she assumes you'll know it's a joke. Once you get to know her, you'll see..."

"I wasn't serious…" I whispered to Shannon.

"Who cares, Warren's _so_ weird. He just keeps staring at Anna."

I grinned and nudged her. "That's not an uncommon reaction in men."

Shannon shrugged and ducked into the back seat of the family van. I bent low and followed, pulling Anna's preoccupied wrist along with me. While we shared snippets of the evening before, the drive to church was, for once, silent in the middle seats, and awkward in the front.

"Even the hint of impropriety is a reflection on character, you know," spoke Warren.

"Hmm-mm, I know," Dad agreed, a sly grin ghosting his features as he met my eyes in the rear-view mirror.

"It seems your oldest daughter shows this purity of character."

I nudged Anna beside me and held back a giggle. Anna's face turned red as she peered out the window, the passing street signs now the most interesting things she'd ever seen.

"I would appreciate if you'd consider myself in that statement as well," added Mary, eavesdropping from the middle.

He briefly looked back to her before resuming his position. "Perhaps."

"Yes Warren, Anna was raised to value certain _decorum_," Mum added, with a fair degree of pride, as if her own example were the sole reason for Anna's behaviour, "… which is why she has a lovely young man pursuing her currently."

"Mum, he's not-"

I grabbed her arm sharply and shot her a look. Without a second thought, the quiet words flew out from between my smiling teeth. "For the sake of this argument, yes, he is, or do you _want_ to have children who dress like traffic cones?"

Anna froze for a moment and then relaxed. From the back seat, she added, "Oh, of course Mum, yes, I am quite taken by him."

"But, you know," Mum continued, now leaning forward to speak closely to Warren, "perhaps Lizzie could be tamed into quite the young lady, if the _right man_ came along."

Apparently Women's Lib was dead and buried.

In the rear view mirror, I could just make out the expression of a man carefully considering a proposition, and by the time we'd reached the church, finally resolving in his mind to do it.

Oh, crumbs.

* * *

Seven Bennets and a Beally entered the double doors of my church and before any Bennet girl had the chance to bolt, Mum informed us that we were going to sit together today, as a family. We all knew that Mum had no real intentions of it being 'family time', but since Dad loved the idea regardless of motivation, what Dad wanted, Dad got.

"Oh, Mary, you sit there… and Anna, dear, come sit next to me..."

Mum was arranging us.

At that moment, Stacey and her father joined us, so Mum had to consider how to fit ten people into two rows and still sit me beside Warren.

'_"Lizzie, dearest, take that seat by Warren,"_' I thought, my mother's tone echoing in my head.

"… and Lizzie, be a pet and sit beside Warren? Yes? Wonderful, we're all set."

Warren on one side, a spare seat on the other: this was my life for the next hour. I considered passing notes to Stacey, via Warren, but he'd probably flip out.

Which would be… awesome.

Smiling at my plan, I jumped when someone slid into the seat next me.

"Jimmy? Jimmy!"

His boyish smile grew a little wider and he offered an ever-so-cool shrug. "Hey Lizzie."

I gave him a big awkward chair hug.

"What are you doing here? I mean, it's great that you're here. Actually," and I lowered my voice, "it's _great_ that you're here, but why- uh, how did you-..."

The chocolate eyes wandering the auditorium focussed back on my face. "You talked about your church real passionate-like, so I thought I'd stop by."

"I'm very glad you did," I said smoothly, sneaking a look at Mum. She'd seen Jimmy just as soon as I had, his long hair and scruffy jeans dominating her attention. Now she sought to subtly shoot me disapproving looks from the next row. Say what you want about her lack of social graces, but for a woman of fifty-three, my mother had fantastic neck craning skills.

* * *

Most of the congregation had spilled out into the foyer, but I smiled as Anna and Harry remained in the auditorium, seated beside each other, chatting away. Perfect.

To my surprise, even after we spent the weekend at his house, Harry still hadn't been all that forthcoming with Anna.

Another week had passed and he hadn't called her, even though he had Anna's number, my number, and the home phone number.

He hadn't asked to spend time alone with her on a 'date'… or even the pretence of a 'just-friends' date.

And he hadn't lost Anna's affection yet, which many an-infatuated guy has done before him…so what was he doing?

"…for example, a business with tax deductions stemming from…"

I turned back to Warren. Thank God Stacey was with me, feigning interest and keeping the conversation going.

"And have you been able to profit from the deregulation personally, Warren?"

And off he went. Bless her.

My Harry-induced reverie persisted a little longer until movement caught my eye. Warren had turned to face me, his hand raising slightly as if to touch my forearm, and then lowered just as quickly.

"…which has lead me to be exceptionally well set-up financially, Lizzie, with a reasonably sized house in the northern suburbs of Adelaide."

"Is that so?! Incredible. Of course, what more could a woman want than a man with a reasonably sized house?"

Warren's chest puffed up with pride at my comment. There, I had done my bit to ensure another man went away thinking that he was God's gift to women.

"And I had the privilege, once, of dining with Magda Alliosia. She is, of course, the owner of our company, but aside from that, a wonderful philanthropist and socialite. I wonder, you have heard of her, am I correct?"

"I can't say I have," I answered, carelessly biting a nail and sharing a look with Stacey.

"Never heard of her? Are you quite serious?"

I smiled. "Yes, this one time, I am quite serious."

"Then perhaps Stella here has heard of her."

He turned to face Stacey. "Have you, Stella?"

Stacey blushed, but didn't correct him. "No, I haven't, but I daresay she's in all the papers if she is half the woman to make her out to be."

"Precisely, she recently donated…" and I tuned out again.

A moment later, Jimmy and the younger sisters crashed into our group, having been shown around the church grounds by Jenny and Shannon, in an energetic manner. For once, I was glad for Jenny and her flirty spirit – it wasn't the first time she'd had a crush on a boy I was interested in, but I knew Jimmy wasn't going to take her seriously and I didn't want him to have to endure more of Warren.

Anna and Harry showed up at that moment, making eight. Introductions were made quickly before Jenny remarked, "Harry, why haven't you called Anna yet?"

The man's eyes widened and his face blushed slightly before Jenny continued. "I was so hoping to go to a party this month and yours is the only one that is a possibility."

"Oh," Harry chuckled, "yes, the party. Definitely. Absolutely. It's next weekend, didn't I tell everyone?"

A chorus of negatives.

"Oh, Chrissy was going to let people know… but no matter. I hope you can all still come. You're all welcome, the more, the merrier!"

From the corner of my eye, Warren's face lit with glee and I inwardly groaned.

Jenny sidled up to Jimmy, grasping his arm desperately and pleading, "You'll come too, won't you Jimmy?"

He laughed, shooting me a private smile. "Of course."

* * *

The musician's instruments had been piled into cases and walked outside and the house lights in the auditorium switched off. Our gentle suggestion to leave the church was the same every week.

Harry and Anna were very slowly strolling towards his car, chatting about how many unicorns it would take to convince people they were real. (Were they really? I don't _know_.)

As Dad sat contemplating in the car with the radio on, and the girls talked with other boys from the church, I pointed out the bus stop to Jimmy. Part of me longed to offer him a ride – another chance to spend time with a boy I liked, rather than a man who wanted to change me – but the car was full already and keeping Jimmy away from Warren was high on my list of priorities this morning.

"I'll see you at work tomorrow?" I asked when we'd reached the bus' green pole.

"Nope, didn't get a shift for tomorrow. Tuesday?"

"I don't think I'm working then…"

Jimmy shrugged, "I'll just have to see you looking gorgeous at the party then."

I grinned at his compliment, but quickly felt my stomach drop. Leaning into him, my eyes focussed on where my sister stood, waving as a Jeep reversed out of its space and asked quietly if he remembered Harry from the night before. He didn't.

"He's friends with Will," I muttered, scratching my elbow.

"Elizabeth!" screeched my mother from across the car park. "Come on, we've leaving. Your friend will be fine on his own."

Shaking my head, I offered a rueful cringe and touched Jimmy's arm. "Sorry about her, I better go. But you should know that there's a high chance Will will be at that party… if that changes your mind."

Never in a million years would I have guessed that Jimmy would tilt his head, crook a smile and close the gap to kiss my cheek.

"Forget him, Lizzie. I'll be there and if he has a problem with it, then _he_ can stay away. It doesn't matter to me who attends the party…" and he shot me a sly look and wink as the old bus pulled alongside the curb, "as long as you're there."

* * *

A/N - Oh man, now I'm starting to like Jimmy too.

I've already written this whole thing - crazy - and as I go back and edit (sometimes heavily, sometimes not so much) before posting, I'm struck by how different an experience it is the second time around. Now, I _like_ Chrissy. I _like_ Jimmy. Is this normal?

Also, I've recently joined the world of internet dating. I don't think it will be successful because I automatically rule out men if they use poor grammar and spelling. It's a tough world, my head.

[I don't care if they have muscles and work out five times a week, if they can't correctly use a semi-colon, I ask you, what hope could we possibly have?]


	8. Chapter 8

Warren Beally stopped by my café three times the next week, and that was on top of his nightly dose of my sarcastic wit and charm. Apparently upon realizing his Grand Quest in life was to, and I quote, "tame Lizzie", he'd upon struck a new sense of purpose in his thirty three years of age – to mould me with strict instruction into the perfectly behaved woman whilst also attempting to 'woo' me. A fantastic combination.

I wandered into the lounge room, where Jenny and Shannon and_ Warren_ were watching an afternoon soap opera on TV. Today he was wearing forest green shorts, a lime green button-up shirt, a turquoise vest and brown moccasins. I didn't know where to look.

"Lizzie," he addressed stiffly, standing as I entered, "I appreciate the care that has gone into selecting your clothes today and please don't feel inferior because they appear old and worn, but be assured that I understand you are a student without a sizable income. Unlike myself."

I looked down at my carefully selected clothes…I was wearing pyjamas. It was the usual result of an early morning shift and an afternoon nap and I wasn't about to change my routine for the incredibly odd man that had taken up residence in our home.

I fell into the couch, weary.

"Oh, don't worry Warren, my feelings of inferiority are safely locked away - just behind my childhood dreams of being a ballerina and in front my opinions about merpeople."

The girls giggled. Warren didn't.

"What an established form of expression ballet is! I have often seen ladies of society, including Ms. Magda Alliosia, express an interest in the classical arts. I must say Lizzie, a love of dance is quite to your benefit."

Oh, shoot me.

"And on that note, perhaps I might request in advance, a waltz with you Elizabeth, at Mr. Bandly's party tomorrow night. Surely with your expertise in dance, you will complement my own talent considerably."  
I tried to hide my smile and keep down my vomit.

"Warren, I assure you that my childish dreams of being a ballerina were about as realistic as the other dreams I had at that age… which were, in fact, to also be a dinosaur. Besides, I hardly think Harry's party is a place for proper dances, I'm sure we'll just... you know.." and I wiggled my arms around a bit.

"Oooh, oooh, it's on!" cried Shannon

"Oh. Well, might I ask for a dance with you anyway?" pressed Warren.

"Shhhhhh!" urged Jenny.

"Ok, sure Warren, whatever you want," I answered, eyes now fixed to the screen. "Waltz, rumba, tango, you got it, just sit down. It's soapie time."

Warren remained standing awkwardly for a moment. Sensing the conversation was over, at least until the next ad break, he sat back down on his chair, worried.

"I don't know the Tango…"

* * *

"Someone looks pretty tonight," commented Stacey as I slid into her front passenger seat.

"Someone's special beau is going to be there," replied Anna, climbing into the back seat.

I gave her a standard glare. "That is a fairly ironic comment coming from _you_."

I turned to Stacey.

"You look fantastic as well Stace, but hurry up and drive, woman! The girls will be out at any moment and I don't want them to see what they are missing," then I lowered my voice, " – a Warren-free car trip- … they'll start clambering over the car trying to get in, just like some bad zombie movie, it won't even matter if you lock your doors, they'll come out with these giant wrenches and start smashing the window…" I even did the actions.

"Okay, okay," Stacey laughed as she reversed the car.

Stacey, Anna and I in Stacey's car; Warren, Jenny, Shannon and Mary in my car. I'd said a little prayer over the Monaro before I'd left…but oh well, small price to pay to avoid an entire car trip with Warren. None of the girls had wanted to go with him either, but due to the six people and the five car seats, it was him or nothing.

What a choice.

The girls chose the party. Perhaps they'd have a better chance of avoiding him during the night though, since they weren't quite of the marriageable age yet… and not taken by some dashing Investment Company owner.

Driving down The Esplanade, I pointed out Harry's house to Stacey. It wasn't as if she couldn't tell… a mansion surrounded by parked cars, music blaring, coloured lanterns lighting the entrance. Awesome.

"Anna!" a deep voice called from behind us as we approached the large double doors of the mansion. David Boas was strolling towards us, a small awkwardly wrapped present under his arm.

"Hi, David!"

"Hi, David!"

"Howdy, Cowboy!"

Guess which one was me.

"Hi, girls! Nice place he's got here, huh?" he asked as he caught up and walked alongside us.

We agreed.

"I wasn't sure what to get him as a present, I mean, what does a guy like that _need_?"

"I'm not sure, either," answered Anna quietly, "but we got him this…" and she pulled out a little wrapped box from her purse.

"It's a key finder…" I explained. "You know, the ones where you whistle and it squeals at you."

"It's not really for the home," apologized Anna, focused on putting it back in her purse, "but we thought-"

And then Anna tripped and almost fell on her face, and I am not even kidding. It would have been mortifying had not David wrapped one arm around her waist and the other arm on her bicep and pulled upward. They stumbled through the front door, the very thing Anna had tripped over, before David erected themselves, laughed a little, and Anna blushed.

"Oh, so _that's_ how you twisted your ankle…" Stacey joked as we came up behind them.  
Anna smiled, shaking her head. "I'm just such a klutz."

"Never mind," shrugged David, "I don't mind being the hero of such a beautiful damsel in distress." Anna shone red while I tried to discern if David's comment was creepy.

… scanning…

…scanning…

nope, he's clean.

He was just being sweet.

"Come and see the backyard," offered Anna finally, trying to change the subject. "It's amazing in the daytime, I can only imagine what they've done for it tonight…"

And off we went: exploring the mansion again, searching for the hosts, sampling delicious finger food. From my excitement at the beginning of the party, I could never have guessed how badly the night would turn.

* * *

A/N - Two chapters in one day, Merry Christmas to YOU! (okay, yeah, so, a few weeks late).

This is a short chapter because we needed to break here.

'WE NEED A BREAK,' I yell at the story.

[It was 44C yesterday and 37C today. I love Perth, and I love heat, but I unabashedly blame it for making me go crazy.]


	9. Chapter 9

Number One.

"He's not coming," Jenny sulked, arms folded, face dejected.

Music blared around us as five Bennet sisters convened on the dance floor.

"Who's not?" asked Anna, again interested in the minor details of our melodramatic sisters. I'd almost completely tuned out as I pivoted on my toes, peering for Stacey, until a familiar name whined from Jenny's mouth.

"Jimmy. He said he would come but I just got a message that he can't make it. Something about car trouble."

"Jimmy?" I asked, pulled back into her tragic production. "My Jimmy?"

"Geez, Lizzie, possessive of your friends much? He's not yours."

I couldn't even deal with her self-assuredness at that moment.

"Whatever, but… he's not coming?"

"No, I told you, he's got car trouble."

"He doesn't own a car."  
Jenny just rolled her eyes and handed me her phone. It was amazing how a few poorly spelt words could disappoint my entire evening.

**To: JenniB**

**From: JimmyReilly**

**Jen! Hun, sumthings come up – my car battery died. Cant make d party but missin u gr8ly. Tell evry1 else, yeah? xxoo**

I reached into my bag and pulled out my own phone.

**No new messages.**

Gee.

Handing back Jenny's phone to its smugger-than-usual owner, I wallowed. In the marshy bog that was my mind, a few bubbles of thought popped up through the mud, bursting gunk over everything.

He wasn't coming.

And he definitely doesn't own a car…

Somewhere between a Sunday kiss on the cheek and a Saturday night party, Jimmy Reilly had changed his mind.

And if I had to guess the reason, he'd be tall, dark and ridiculously tiresome.

I shook my head and clenched my fists, but there was one thought bubble left waiting to erupt the question that I couldn't get my head around was, despite meeting once at church… when did Jenny and Jimmy become _friends_?

Number Two.

I had resolved to try to enjoy the rest of the night, even without the said male interest present. I'd dressed to impress, and the night was still young, so why shouldn't I have a great night?

"Elizabeth, I do believe our time has come to dance."

Oh, that was why.

Warren, in a pale blue vest over an electric blue shirt. Black pants. Red shoes.

I turned to him with a smile, determined to not let him affect my night, "What did you say?"

"In accordance with our discussion yesterday, I would like to ask you to dance. I do believe this song to be of the three/four time signature, and thus," he spoke with an unnatural level of confidence, "… a waltz."

I had no idea what he was- … oh. No. He couldn't be serious. He wouldn't.

But looking at his calm demeanour and expectant gaze, hand now outstretched toward me, I knew he meant it. A waltz. At a party.

Sure, why not? Social suicide is all the rage these days.

Oh, crap on a stick.

* * *

Avril Lavigne sang her little Canadian heart out about keeping holding on, and I clung to those words for dear life.

One, two, three.

One, two, three.

One, two, three.

I was counting in my head - trying to keep in time - follow his lead - not step on any toes (his or my own), but it was easier said than done. I was busy staring my feet, because really, the alternative was to look at the entire crowd of people now watching the two most awkward weirdoes to ever poorly dance the waltz on the patio of a mansion in Peppermint Grove.

The song swelled to the bridge and to my infinite relief, from the corner of my eye, I spotted Anna.

And David Baos.

Also doing the waltz.

Also next to us.

I was (just barely) saved!

Looking up finally, I shot her a look. She shot one back, smiling.

_Thankyou! - You're welcome._

It's a sister-thing.

* * *

To say I escaped The Waltz unscathed would be a lie - two bruised toes, one bruised ego and a possible unrepayable debt to my sister. But not complete social suicide.

Well, that's what I thought until Number Three.

Watching the three most awkward minutes of my life was, of course, Will. Of course. It would be too much to ask that my most despised person and reason for Number One could perhaps, just this once, allow me to retain _some_ dignity.

Apparently not, because there he stood, at the front of the crowd, arms folded, unimpressed.

And probably not just because of my dancing skills.

Not socially apt, he'd said.

There was not one part of me that wanted to admit that he might be right.

* * *

Number Four

Warren wanted a repeat performance.

By that point, I was ready to tell him where he could take his repeat performance and-

"Lizzie's got to come with me," informed Anna, grabbing my arm and pulling me away from the circle rather forcefully for the lithe creature that she was.

"Stacey, tag team?" I quietly requested desperately, being drawn away.

"I got your back, Lizzie," replied Stacey. "So, Warren, how's your work going? Numbers still adding up?"

"Why yes, actually, I've found that with the residual quarterly returns…"

"Run, Lizzie!" hissed Anna, the moment I was out of the group. So I did, as far as was justifiable – the upstairs bathroom.

I remembered where it was from _My Time At Peppermint Grove's Most Newly Leased Mansion _and snuck inside, locking the door, turning around and letting myself slide down to the shiny black and white tiles.

Ten minutes passed.

Then another five.

Eventually, I stood, smoothed down my simple black dress and breathed a breath that was meant to inspire confidence in me. I hoped it worked.

I could do this. I could handle Warren and be confident and strong and laugh in the face of adversity. No assuming man was going to hinder _my_ enjoyment.

Yanking the door open and striding out, I marched myself down the stairs back into the throng of mingling people and sought out Anna. I couldn't see her. Okay, Stacey then. Nope. Mary-Jenny-Shannon? … No.

"Elizabeth!"

I hadn't looked, but I knew who it was, and I moved, fast!

So much for my confidence.

Knowing the layout of the mansion was to my advantage though, and I soon hurried down an empty darkened hall.

"Elizabeth!" it continued, still following.

I needed to disappear.

To vanish.

Grasping the knob of the closed door and quickly turning it, I spun inside the dim room, and closed the door behind me. I let out a nervous breath and waited, sure that he would have no idea where I was…

I had done it. I had escaped him! I was like a ninja - so smooth, so silent, so unseen. I was-

"Elizabeth."

I froze.

Number Five

Pro: it wasn't Warren's voice.

Con: There was only one other male calling me 'Elizabeth' these days.

I turned around slowly. I decided to go with the confidence thing.

"Oh hey Will, didn't see you there, whatcha up to… mate?"

**_Smooth, Lizzie._**

I winced.

Between him and me was a pool table, the low overhead lamp giving off a soft yellow glow. The walls were filled with books, and a small sitting space had been created by the bay window, which was where, I assumed, Will had been sitting… before he'd had to stand to confront the brown-haired crazy that had just invaded his space.

He held up the book in his hand, finger holding the page. "Reading."

A pause.

"And… yourself?"

"Umm, I… well, ah,… yeah…"

"_Elizabeth_!" the voice called from the hall, now seriously close.

My expression changed. Worried eyes look to Will, pleading with him not to say anything.

Placing his book on the pool table, he strode over to the door.

I glared at him intensely the entire way. He was going to rat me out.

He reached past me, his body now very close to mine, and opened the door slightly, just as another grand call came from Warren.

"Elizabeth!"

"She's not here," Will spoke sharply, through the small gap.

"Do you know where I can find her?"

"Perhaps she went home."

Then Will closed the door. Conversation over.

"You can't stay in here," said Will, marching over to the bay window and pulling the heavy drapes shut.

"I won't make any noise."

"No, I mean… it's not _proper_."

Urgh, there he was with the _proper_ thing again.

"Oh. Well, I guess Warren's gone for awhile, so I suppose I should thank-"

"Play pool with me."

"Huh?"

"I would like it if you would… play pool with me."

"I thought I couldn't stay."

"Not if you're just going to stand around. But, if you have a reason to be in here with me, _like playing pool,_ then I suppose a situation like that could be acceptable."

Oh, okay, well, thanks for clearing that up, CrazyMan.

But I didn't fight it.

"Sure. But I'll probably win, okay? Just so you know."

He said nothing and racked up the balls.

"Your break. Ladies first."

I didn't fight that either.

Save the clacking of the pool balls, our shots were played in silence.

… But then he started winning, so I started playing dirty.

"Oh, Will, I just found out the other day that I work with a friend of yours… Jimmy? Jimmy Reilly? We're quite close."

Desired effect accomplished. Will's eyes darkened, his face hardened and even his grip on the pool cue tightened slightly.

"Jimmy has a talent for making friends, you will have noticed that."

**_Jenny_**.

"Your shot. He seems to have lost _your_ friendship."

"Evidently."

Will took his shot, and I was disappointed that he still managed to sink one of his pool balls. "I'm not sure Jimmy has the character to keep friends, though."

"You're judging _his_ character?"

"I am. Your shot."

I scoffed. I took my shot and missed, the maroon '7' ball darting to the left of the corner pocket.

"Don't you think that's a little, hypocritical?"

At that remark, Will folded his arms, unpleased. "What are you getting at, Elizabeth?"

I perked up and smiled. "Oh, nothing. Just trying to figure you out."

"And what have you decided?" he asked carefully while he sunk his last coloured ball.

I considered him for a moment, but my non-response was enough to make him look up and hold my gaze.

"I think perhaps with you," I finally said coarsely, "nothing is what it seems."

Will looked down and pushed the pool cue. The white ball rolled, rolled, rolled… knocking the eight ball gently into the far corner pocket.

And my night wasn't even over.

After Will's final pool ball fell gracefully into its designated pocket, he straightened and walked purposely over to me. My eyes held fast to his and he reached past me, placing his pool cue on the stand.

"Perhaps you're right," he said finally. Heavily.

I could smell him now, a lingering of leather and wood shavings, like I used to find in my Dad's shed when I was a child… but heck if I knew male scents. His measured breathing irritated me. This man that had treated Jimmy so cruelly, this man that had abandoned his illegitimate child… now stood before me, peering down with a curious expression.

"Elizabeth? Elizabeth! Finally!" burst forth Warren, now careening through the door and causing Will to fall back quickly, creating so much space between us, it was almost impossible that a moment before we'd been so close.

Number Six

"Warren, how great to see you," I greeted with no mirth.

"Elizabeth, you'll never believe how long I've been looking-… oh, hello…"

Suddenly Warren's eyes went wide and his mouth fell open. It would have been comical if it wasn't so mortifying.

"You're my…Elizabeth, he's my… you're my boss."

Will winced.

"You're related to Magda Alliosa, aren't you? You're her son!"

"Nephew," he corrected cautiously.

"Warren Beally," he walked forward, thrusting out his hand, "accountant at GDM, Adelaide office."

Will shook it, but said nothing.

"How amazing, Elizabeth, I've come all this way to Perth, and would you know it? I've run into Magda's nephew! They said Perth was small, but this! Of all the people to meet!"

"It's not _small_," I muttered to myself. Summoning my patience, I turned to my houseguest. "How about we go now, Warren," I asked softly. As much as I dreaded _requesting_ to spend time with Warren, it was better than whatever surreal embarrassment was currently unfolding.

"Yes, of course Elizabeth, but in a moment, William and I are talking."

He spoke to me like as to child. I reddened, frowned and literally bit my tongue down to keep it from blurting out something rude and completely justified.

"Perhaps some time this week you and I could have lunch together," continued Warren, barging blindly ahead with his plans, "you know, talk about how the company is going. Can I get your number?"

Will shot a look to me. Suddenly the awkwardness that had passed between us moments earlier, seemed nothing compared to the onslaught that Warren brought with him.

"Sure. Call my office." Will pulled out his wallet from the pocket of his dress pants and pulled out a business card, passing it to Warren's eager hands.

You didn't have to be a genius to know that he would not get past the secretary.

As much as I wanted to feel sorry for Warren's ignorance, I could only be glad to be saved from further humiliation.

I'd had enough.

"We're going NOW, Warren," I ordered, grabbing his arm and pulling. Luckily he was shorter than me.

"'Women'" Warren raised his hands as if to imply he was humouring me. If I wasn't so desperate to get him out of the room, I would have punched him in the crotch.

* * *

"Nice guy, that one," remarked Warren as I led him back outside, busy inspecting the business card.

"Yeah, he's the best," I muttered absent-mindedly, looked for my sisters again.

"Lizzie, where have you been?!" screeched Mary, suddenly beside me, her usually coiffed hair now a mess.

"Hiding…why? What's wrong?"

Number Seven

"Look." Mary pointed to the lawn at the far end of the backyard. There, Jenny and Shannon were giggling and dancing away to themselves.

"They're drunk," spoke Anna, appearing at my other side.

"What?! Who let them drink?"

"Lizzie, it's an open party," informed Mary, "and _no one_ was here to watch them."

Yep, she'd meant me.

I breathed deeply. What I needed now, was action.

"We're going home. Mary, get the girls to the car. Anna, you can stay-"

"No, I should be with you guys."

I lowered my voice. "But what about Harry?"

"It'll be alright, I'll just say I've got a headache or something."

Part of me wanted to tell her to stay, there weren't always many opportunities to make your affection known, and this was such a good one…

… but then, I knew when I hit the house, I'd need as much help with Jenny and Shannon as I could get.

"Okay, thanks."

But, we had a problem, and he came in two forms: awkward and super-awkward.

"Mary, can you ask Stacey if she can drop Warren back at the house? No, wait, you're getting the girls in. Okay, I'll do it. Meet at the car in ten minutes. Go."

Us three Benet sisters split, leaving Warren standing alone on the crowded dance floor.

"You're staying here with Stacey," I explained hurriedly to Warren, heels clacking on the polished tiles as I rushed to the car, "and she'll drop you home."

"But I wanted to go with you, Elizabeth, I have," and he took a deep breath, "I have something I wanted to ask you."

"It'll have to wait, Anna's feeling sick so we need to leave. Just think of it this way, we're not cutting your party short, you can go home whenever you like…" I gave him a smile. "It's a good thing, really."

The girls were standing at the car already, leaning on it, waiting. Well, except for Jenny and Shannon who were twirling around the front lawn, giggling.

God help me.

"Who's got the keys?"

"Warren brought us," answered Mary.

"Waaaarrrrrrrreeeennnnn," sang Jenny.

"Laaaurrrreeeennnn," sang Shannon.

"Let's get them in the car," encouraged Anna.

"Are they okay?" asked Warren, confused. "I thought Anna was sick."

"I am!" rushed Anna. "Very, very sick. Ow, my head." Anna grabbed her head, dramatically.

"Warren, do you have the keys please?"

"Oh, sure Elizabeth, just let me get them here…" and he reached into his pocket and pulled out the keys and the small white card.

"Here you go, the keys, oh and you can keep this since you know Will, it's just his secretary's number and I already have that." He seemed disappointed but I didn't have time to care.

"Great, thanks," and I turned to open my car door.

And froze.

Number Eight

There, on that little white piece of card was a name that had haunted my existence since before I'd even learnt how to read.

**William Darcy, CEO.**

You're got to be freakin' kidding me.

* * *

A/N - Teeheeheehee, I just giggled the whole way through writing this chapter.

I'm super happy to have finally posted again, you loyal readers were waiting awhile and I ACKNOWLEDGE that, you champions, you. Apologies.

Real life did get busy (I moved back home from where I was housesitting) and then it was AUSTRALIA DAY! Now life is returning back into some semblance of normalcy and I have retrieved my tiny, tiny computer from the big bad world of all-my-stuff-crammed-into-ikea-baskets. Perhaps now updates all around? We can hope. ("*You* get an update, *you* get an update, YOU ALL GET UPDATES!")

Also, every review makes me edit 2.6431% faster. Proven fact. It's science. #justsaying


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